Backpacks 4 Aussie Kids

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2011-06-13T23:51:00.001+10:00

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Mrs. W - a personal account of a childhood in care

2011-05-08T13:26:00.001+10:00

Attention - some images and text in this blog post may upset those people living in denial that child abuse and youth suicide exist

I was born January 1977, that makes me just over 34 today (april 2011). In the 70's there was not much room in society for single mum's so there was alot of abortion's or fostered out children in those times. My life started out a little lucky, I was born into an already large family of my mum still at home with her Mum n Dad and 3 sisters and one brother, so I had a Nan n Pop and 3 aunties, 1 uncle and we all lived under the one roof. Life was great, even though I don't remember my Mum much at that stage - my Nan was always there for me she was never a particularly cuddly women but neither was my mum! So I was used to a distance in that way but my Nan somehow by just being there for me-always - it was like a cuddle. Dinner was at the same time EVERY night so was bath and bed - there was such a strict routine it hugged me like a blanket!

I remember kinder and I remember Nan and I remember the family dog and sometimes I remember my aunties n my uncle-I struggle to remember my mum..
Even though we shared the same room together-she used to come home very late at night I was already tucked up fast asleep. It wasn't until I was' around 13 my Nan would re-call stories that made her cry, she said when my mum walked in the door, I would run for a cuddle...but she used to push me away...maybe it's lucky I don't have these memories, for my sake.

My mum had a few boyfriends, but one guy stuck, when I was 8 yrs old, I was introduced to "Bill", he was an overweight, stocky, short man - not particularity attractive, with those scary tinted glasses - when he came to the door to take my mum on a "date" I do remember getting a "chill" I did not like him from the moment I met him! But Mum must have seen something in him, a few mnths later they were married, and I was whisked away with her to live with him, less than 6mnths later my step brother was born (you do the math!)

While all this was going on un-be-known to me - "Bill" was legally adopting me, so I now carried his surname, also they took over the local Cake shop, things (on the outset) looked rosy for my Mum...but that was not the reality, the following is quiet a chilling but brief account of my next 4 yrs within this family unit....take a breathe (me too), and...lets go......

While business was strong, we had a life plentiful, we ate out nearly every night (which suited mum as she could not cook), we could have anything we wanted.
And my mum did - she had drinks on tap - yes she became an alcoholic-almost overnight (to me anyway), her judgment was blurred - she became extremely abusive to me and I now became my step brothers carer - I was just over 8.5 but had to grow up over night, I was changing nappies, feeding him, bathing him, because my mum either couldn't or she didn't want to, all I remember my baby brother eating at one stage was custard - I did not know what else to give him-know one told me-I did what I could...so I also grew to resent him-something I regret, even to this day!

While my mum was drinking scotch for breakfast lunch and dinner- my new "dad" paid alot more attention to me-something that was new to me and as I was having a particularly tough time with my mum, I was coerced into spending alot more time with him. He showered me with attention -which was something new to me, and turned me against my mum who now had resorted to withholding me my breakfast as I had to clean the house every morning-top to bottom, before school, so I had to wake by 6am, feed and clean my baby brother-who sensed the stress by this point he started to eat holes through his blankets, then I had to vacuum, mop, scrub the whole house- EVERY morning before school, so my first meal would usually be lunch-maybe a packet of chips and a big M from the canteen.

Anyway the alcohol she inhaled everyday almost all day turned my mum into a monster, she would beat me endlessly either with her fist, the vacuum cleaner steel rod, a wooden spoon and once she came at me with a kitchen knife, it was now official - I did now also resent my mother. So "Bill" pounced, I had to work in the family business, I worked after school every day AND I was forced to go in to work 5am Sat morning, just with him...alone, a good 3 hrs before any staff were due to start - that's when it started...

"Bill" by the end, had raped me for over 4 yrs, he used more than his personal bits to do so-anything that was lying around would suffice, there was one time I saw some remorse in him, it was one particular time he made me bleed...I ran and hid, he never came to find me - now this stuff is very hard to talk about so I am skimming over lots, but I have not to my sadness forgotten much at all, it still feels like yesterday-at times-especially now-now that I have children of my own.

My once sheltered life with my Nan had now been ripped from me, I was whisked away, adopted, and then raped and abused, physically, mentally and emotionally by both my mother and my step dad, but I found a way out When I was 12, my school had a "say no" seminar.

That day I found out all about what's right and what's wrong and what was happening to me was VERY WRONG! I did a runner I was found by my best friend and her mum. They took me to their house, I told my story and they rang CSV. So in one day I went to school just like any other day, but all this unfolded there after, and before the school bell rang I was taken by CSV back to my locker to collect my things - kicking and screaming I was taken to a country police station

And now I just remember sitting in a corner of the police station with just the clothes on my back hugging a bear a constable gave me (I called it "Dakin" :) ) and much later again - I was taken to my first ever foster home to later spend another 3 weeks there - it was not the saddest time of my life being taken out of home - but it was the scariest.

I begged them to take me back home even though I knew what would await me there - I just wanted to go back home-to what I knew-the untold future that awaited me, frightened the hell out of me! I was so frightened of what my mum would do to me once she had me back home-that I begged to go back-they would not and could not take me back they said-so I cried for days not believing them when they said I will never be back home-I thought my mum will find a way to get to me somehow-someway! I knew how much she hated me-resented me! This was sure to take her over the edge!

Now in a turn of fate, while I was staying at my new foster home-completely miserable, crying and alone...a call came-it was for me they tell me it's my "Pop" - I couldn't beleive it! But it was true, while I was in my foster home - my "parents" were interviewed and charged - my mum fessed up to the police and so did he- and only a bit was said to my Pop, but it was enough, he found me and I was now back with my Nan and my Pop-life was good again........for just a little while.

Before I turned 13 my Pop took very ill, I had to go-they couldn't keep me-I ended up in a youth Hostel in Melb's North, I was on my own-with new faces, new issues, new problems. The one thing that I did have from all this was, I was back to where I came from - I had some friends I had known and we met back up again-one of them was my now current husband who I love with all my heart and always have-my one-
and only true love!

This hostel was very different for me-we had a live in family-but they looked after sometimes up to 6 of us at a time-plus their own kids too, there was kids that came and went like a revolving door - but there were some like me who stayed on for years then were old enough to move on, one of the "stayer's was "Trevor" he, like all of us there had an awful childhood, he was abused by family
and pretty much neglected.

I got on with my life pretty much I got a p/t job to earn money so I could have nice things (but I was also still at school), now Trevor was one of the ones who decided he'd use his time at the hostel by dropping out of school, running a muck-causing a bit of grief for all of us - we had lots of "group meetings" but he couldn't stick to the rules - he used to escape through his window at night, we had a curfew-but he didn't listen.

The boys got to sleep altogether in one room, they used to play up all hrs of the night, they were in the next room to me-we were never aloud locks on our doors for our own safety -they used to tell us-but when the boys kept escaping they put window locks on all windows - that didn't stop "Trevor".

See he was like a puppy that just needed a cuddle and some acknowledgment at times - when he didn't get that-he would do silly things - one night (after much a strange smell wafting from the boys room-yes drugs) he tapped on my window in the wee hrs of the morn - I yelled at him to go away, he said he had something to show me - so I crawled out of bed and go to the front yard - well he had stolen a car and was very pleased with himself so much that he had to show me - much like a puppy brings a bone to show his owner, I said he was crazy-and going to get in big trouble-he just laughed at me, jumped in the car and sped off running straight through a roundabout and on the wrong side of the road!

All was quiet again for a bit, but then weeks later, "Trevor" asks me for a razor - I was suspicious and asked him why-but he assured me just to "shave" - he looked scruffy so I said "OK, use mine but I want to see it when your done!"

Well, I had gone to bed, and later I awake to find him standing over me with wrists out - I turn on the light with a jump...to find he had slit both wrists so badly that blood was spurting out and sprayed his face, I nearly fainted but my brain said "save him"!

So I grabbed both his wrists and ran with him upstairs to get our carer...me, the carer and "Trevor" went to the hospital-me still holding his wrists as tight as I could in the back seat, we got to the hospital-and he came up with some lame excuse that it was an accident-but because he lied the Hospital staff wouldn't treat him!!!??? I am still amazed at this, even today-they turned us away! But Trevor needed stitches! It didn't matter-we didn't matter or he didn't matter - after long hrs of arguing and back n forth with the hosp...we went home-he was shattered! We all were.

He was kept up stairs with the carers that night-then all I can remember one night-a few weeks later, our carers sat us down-minus Trevor. we asked where was" Trevor" - they said he had been taken by police, he has stolen another car-this time got caught-and he had caused an accident, he was charged and placed in youth detention. Life kinda was still after that-see "Trevor" was cheeky and naughty - but he was still just a boy-and he did crave what we all do, that is someone to love us-but he chased it in all the wrong ways

...6mnths later, just as I was starting to wonder about "Trevor", we were sat down again by our carers - this time was different - this was no usual house meeting-the air was grim, and after a long pause our carers spoke - they told us......

the reason we haven't been able to get onto "Trevor" lately is, "he was found dead - they say it was suicide"................

And so that was that - I can't remember what we all did that night- or what we said there after - all I know is we were all extremely sad - even though my life and the peoples around me in that house had encountered some things that would shock the pants off your regular citizen - this bit of news pretty much took the cake for a lot of us - it was a huge thing to be in your early teens going through -what we're been through-to then hear one of your house mates is dead-that was a first for me, and a very sad one at that.

After a few years we all took our leave one way or the other from this Hostel, I kept working, left school at end of year 10, work and earning money was more important for me than study, just so I could buy things and have nice clothes n buy a car - I did all of that - so did many of my ex-Hostel house mates-we all found our path eventually - even though our road wasn't paved as much as other kids our age - it had its fair share of bumps and pot holes - but we got through.

Here's to holding your head high, believing in yourself and remembering it's never too late to become what you might have been.

Mrs. W

(names and dates have been changed to protect people)

I would like to thank Mrs. W, for her honest account of just some of the things that have happened in her life. She wrote this post herself, which as far as I'm concerned was a very brave thing to do. I began to edit it, but decided that the way it was written came from a very personal place and it reads as such. I hope this brings some light to someone's life who has struggled with similar issues. Mrs. W, now has a loving husband and family of her own.... des.

Calm Photographics

2011-04-30T13:19:00.000+10:00

I am pleased to introduce you to Katey, a wonderfully generous person who is living her dream. She has donated prizes to our project and has been my 'official' photographer for publicity shots :o)

Katey Dade O'Farrell

I started taking photos at around 11 years old when my mother gave me her old instamatic camera. I love the feel of it in my hands and my passion was grown when I did work experience with a cairns photographer at 15. On returning to school I spoke to my art teacher who began to tutor me after school. He is a well-known portrait photographer with some of his work being shown in galleries around Australia.

The smell of the dark room and the magic of the image appearing before my eyes confirmed it, I was hooked!! In year 12 we were asked where we wanted to be in 10 years and my goal was to have my own studio. It then took me 13 years to realise my dream!

The couple who were told they could never have children - Rick and Chloe, they are now expecting a little boy in June!! (next lot of maternity photos done on 10th may so look out!!)

At Christmas 2009 I was a stay at home mum to my son Jonathan, who was one at the time, when I decided that 2010 was going to be the year of “yes”. I had been asked by friends over the years to do photos for them and always said no being too scared they wouldn’t think my work was good enough. So I went on eBay, upgraded my 35mm Nikon F70 to a digital Nikon D100 and then set about designing business cards, doing free shoots to work up my folio and the ever impossible task of deciding on a business name.

I came about the name Calm Photographic while teaching my son the sounds of letters. We were doing the letters of my name, Kathleen Helen Mary – Ka Ha Mm, Calm, and the rest is history!! I did everything possible to expand my business from running Facebook competitions to donating photo shoots for raffles. I found the Connect to Aussie Mums an invaluable resource and made a lot of wonderful contacts in the process.

I decided to specialise in family, pregnancy and confidence photography.

Some of the greatest jobs I have done were the year 12 formal of a group of disabled students, a 15 day old little girl on a Harley Davidson chopper, pregnancy photos of an infertile couple and the confidence photos of an opera singer who had lost her waist length hair to chemo. The joy on their faces when you give them the end result and they see just how beautiful they are regardless of what they have been through is just priceless.

I love to hear the stories and have been told my business name is very appropriate as I have a manner which puts the client at ease and make the whole process extremely enjoyable. (I even got hugs from an autistic girl who doesn’t even hug her own mother!)

Miss Ella on Chopper Mikes Harley Davidson. This was done for daddy as a very special surprise. Mummy and Daddy are the couple who were told they would never have children so she is a very special little girl and is about to be a big sister!!

Meanwhile my husband and I had been trying to have our second child and imagine my surprise when I discovered I was pregnant in February after only 7 months of trying! (Jonathan had taken 3 years to conceive) I decided I was going to continue doing what I loved right through my pregnancy as it was after all the year of “yes”! This proved to be a struggle in itself as chasing toddlers is difficult at any time let alone rolling around on the ground with them at 8 months pregnant!

At 7 months I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes which was a HUGE shock as we have no family history of diabetes. So on top of it all, I felt sick and tired most of the time but business was picking up so it was no time to quit. In September my grandfather, who I am very close to, was hospitalised with what was thought to be gall stones but was later diagnosed to be gall bladder cancer. We had visits from my brother and sister (who was also pregnant with her fourth child) and I were also doing my sons day-care school photos! I was starting to struggle both emotionally and physically.

My last job before going on maternity leave was a wedding in Townsville so we drove down at 5 in the morning and I worked through till 11pm that night! (32 weeks pregnant mind you, I gave birth at 36 weeks) While it was my first wedding I was thrilled with the results as was the couple, I stressed immensely over the work fearing they would hate it!

L-R Alex, Hannah, Kate and Hayden. This was their year 12 formal for Cairns state high, on the night Alex won an popularity award!! They were such a beautiful group. Hannah does not show affection and came up and hugged me several times, she dosnt even do that to her mother!

In November I delivered the last of the school photos and our second son Joshua on the same day and decided to resume work in January after a short break. Two days after his birth my grandfather passed away and I was told as I had had a C-section I was not to drive to Innisfail for the funeral. Yeah right!! With the help of some wonderful drugs and the support of my family we made it through.

I thought with great anticipation that I would still resume my business the following January. This was not to be as Joshua fell ill and had to be hospitalised 5 times between January and March of this year. During all this time I had not dealt with my grief of losing my grandfather or the stress of the past 12 months and succumbed to a bi-polar depressive episode. (I was diagnosed with bi-polar in 2006) I sought help from the wonderful staff at the Cairns base mental health unit and am now adjusting to new medication and having regular therapy to deal with all the emotional issues incurred in the past 12 months.

Kriss and Emily - Kriss has Aspergers, really fun kid!! We had a ball doing these pics - were also first client in my studio!

Needless to say, I did not go back to work in January, rather in April of this year. I have since set up a studio in a friend’s home office and have started advertising on my Facebook page again. In response to a few call outs on this page I have now got 3 pregnancy, 3 newborns, 3 confidence and 2 family shoots booked for next 12 months after not quite a month back! I am so excited about the future and everything seems to be falling into place again, the creative juices are flowing and the babies are all healthy and happy! I think the thing I have learned from my year of “yes” is that no matter how hard it gets, you can’t give up, it will only get better – eventually! While my business may not earn us a huge amount of money, it is the most rewarding career (besides motherhood of course!) I have ever had as it is mine, I have grown it from nothing and it is something I love!

Joy has stage 3 breast cancer and this picture was taken during her 2nd round of chemo when she lost all her hair (she had waist length jet black hair!)She is an inspirational beautiful woman!!

Links:

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Calm-Photographics

Jillybear... a young girl with a big heart!

2011-04-23T12:46:00.003+10:00

Jill started beading at age 3. She loves it and always makes new little
things and comes out to me to get them tied up. I've been massively into
voluntary work. I get my kids involved and have them come along to things
that are suitable.

I used to be a family day care provider and I liked to teach my kids and
others about world issues in a gentle way. I would talk to them about less
fortunate people or situations and then we would follow the conversation
with an action/activity to help or show their understanding Eg a
fundraiser or auction. I had friend who went as far as spending their
holidays in bali to help kids who were orphans. My kids were shown pics
send back via email about what a difference only a few dollars can make.

We moved from SA to NSW 12 mths ago so I became a bit of a fb addict to
keep in touch with people. I came across WAHM's who made thigns for sale
and auctions so often Id get my kids to pick things and we would bid or
buy them. Jill came to me one day before her birthday and said someting
along the lines of "mum I want you to make me a shop on facebook so I can
sell my necklaces and give the money to kids overseas who have nothing to
eat." I just about cried! A few days after her 6th birthday I collected up
all the latest things she had made and put them up on facebook. Her nick
name was always Jillybear so that why its her shop name. Things just
started selling ...from people I didnt know, so we decided to get her a
propper site.

Approx 7 mths later her online shop was ready with the help of a lovely
stranger I didnt know from a site called littleherohosting.com (now very
good friends and I met her last time I was in SA) she gave jill all the
design work of the store for free.

So young, so v-e-r-y busy: How does Jillian Pace feel about having her own website for her jewellery business?"Very excited, very happy."Picture: Gary Warrick http://www.penrithstar.com.au

After the site went up she gave herself a goal of $1,000 before Christmas
and shes currently around $470.

We chose the company Australian Lutheran World Serive vs a well known
charity as they have much lower overheads than most places that forward on
donations.

She saw a few other great sites like yours and wanted to donate bulk lots
to them to use. She decided she wanted to also help smaller groups so she
has 1 album that changes every few months (from not for profit causes she
finds on fb). Currently she is helping Asppired Ltd.

We love your cause as we used to do special needs teens fostercare (crisis
care) until Jill was 2.
We are in the middle stages of being foster parents again for babies (0-9
mths) for emergency/crisis care.

(we love you too Jilly! and Mummy of course)

Links:
http://www.jillybearsjewels.com/
http://www.facebook.com/pages/Jillybears-Jewels/138050662905720

You can read more about Jill here:

http://www.penrithstar.com.au/news/local/news/general/jillybears-jewels-shine/2105290.aspx

Super EASY Brownies! Recipe by Richelle

2011-04-17T21:04:00.000+10:00

Super EASY Brownies

These are super easy to make and a favorite in our household with everyone!

You need:
125g butter
125g chocolate

3eggs
1 1/2 cups castor sugar (normal white sugar is fine)
1 tsp vanilla essence
1 cup plain flour
1/4 cup cocoa powder
3/4 cup walnuts (optional)
icing sugar to dust

Method:
1) Melt butter and choc together

2) Whisk eggs, sugar and vanilla
3) Add choc /butter mixture
4) Add sifted flour, cocoa and nuts (I don't sift my flour because I’m too lazy and don't want any extra dishes)
5) Pour into a greased & lined tin
6) Cook in a preheated oven @ 180 degrees for 40min
7) Allow to cool in tin, cut into squares, dust with icing sugar and demolish!

My notes:

· I use block chocolate or choc drops/buds, milk or dark, it’s good for whatever you have avail.

· I melt my chocolate in the microwave... you want soft choc that will go smooth when you stir it! Do NOT keeping heating it until you get liquid everything as the chocolate will most likely go yuck! I do mine for just 1 minute in a pyrex (glass) jug.

· I use castor sugar or white sugar – both work well!

· I rarely add the nuts, mainly due to the little mouths in our household (under 2yo’s should not have nuts)

· And most importantly, the beauty of this recipe is if it's not cooked enough, you have gooey brownies, if it's cooked a bit too long, it's more like a slice... So long as it’s not running out the tray or blackened, it’s going to be YUMMO!

Enjoy :)
Richelle

Extract from our Facebook fan page

2011-03-31T21:26:00.002+10:00

Extract from Facebook page
Backpacks 4 Aussie Kids
I get sooo pissed off when I hear about kids moving placements and turning up to their new family with hardly anything!!! Dear Carer, what were you spending the money on? Where are their clothes!!!???

- Bryce -- i totally agree it is discusting behaviour |
- Emma --That's terrible Des :( So sad that some people do it for the money - the genuine people know the money is barely enough to support the child!
- Kim --Its very sad.. I had the same problem when i was doing emergency care.. And Daycare.. It made Me so cranky.. Sometimes id sit there and cry..
- Melissa --My neighbour is a temporary carer, she is one of the few who will buy the children what they need and send it off with them. She had 3 little girls come in once and all they had was a tiny suitcase of clothing between them. One of the girls was the same size as my daughter so my daughter ran over and gave her some stuff. But your right it is unfair and these children need everything. Why are they not being supplied with it when carers get reimbursed and money for the things they spend on these kids.
- Backpacks 4 Aussie Kids I know right?! If you have a child for 3 months or even 1 month and they move placements, they should have a least a bag of clothes that fit them as well as other bits and pieces. wtf?
- Jane Grech-- Its disgusting isnt it! Maybe people should be paid in vouchers but then, there isnt a store that just sells reasonably priced kids clothing and supplies and nothing else!
- Paula --
  Why would you not send their belongings. I have had my little darling treasure boy since he was 5 months old. Now 20 months. I don't get an allowance but when that horrible day comes when he goes away I will send everything with him. I will... be heartbroken. His first pair of shoes, his first hair cut. They all belong to him not me. I have just been blessed with a gorgeous child that I will forever treasure. Money shouldn't be the issue. You foster because you want to share your love and you are passionate about children. Money shouldn't be the reason you do it! Unfortunately people do it for that reason!
- Jenny-- i have to send kids dvds to tasmania for my friend who has 5 children in her care
- Sandra -- they cld state what the vouchers are for. i know that you cannot get cigarettes on vouchers from vinnies etc so they cld do a similar thing for these kiddies surely
- Melina -- Yes and stop keeping items given for the child. they are the childs not yours or your childrens
- Yasmin --lol i had this issue a few days ago 2 kids been in the system for 7 months and have just come to me with a plastic shopping bag of clothes each and a pair of thongs disgusting is all i can say
- Yasmin --on the bright side shopping spree !:)
- Danielle --
  It pisses me off. It happens pretty regularly and it's always second hand clothes they come with so the carers get out of it as cheap as possible it's just so wrong. I have just recently had two kids move into permanent care that I had for ...12 months they needed a car and a station wagon to take the two kids and all the stuff I had bought them to their new placement. I have 4 of my own kids and their is enough toys here for them to play with but I always will buy the kids I have somethings of their own whether I have them for 2 days, 2 months or 2 years.
  Sorry to rant but this is one thing that gets my blood boiling. See more
- Sandra -- Grrrrrrrrr when we start fostering that will NOT be happening with any of our kids! Even if I get most of their clothing second hand (most of MY kids wear second hand clothing) they'll still be taking it with them! It's THEIRS not the carer's! Makes you wonder what they were wearing during placement! How awful to be shipped off with only the clothes on your back :-(
- Jane --The positive from this discussion is that it highlights there are some wonderful carers armong YOU, doing it for all the right reasons. Be encouraged by each other, and by those of us who are inspired by your passion, your generosity and love for these children requiring love and care so desperately. Keep up the excellent work, and don't let the bastards get you down.
- Sarah -- Unfortunately we had to move our last child on to more experienced carers, he had a lot of stuff and EVERYTHING when with him, after all they were his. However this was not appreciated at the other end and we were told he was spoilt. He certainly didnt have a lot of toys, there was a volume of clothes but these had been gifts etc. As previously said this is their belongings, something familiar to them, of course it goes with them.
- Michelle --As a carer i'm horrified that this happens. We have accepted placements that come from other carer's @ some of these children have come with nothing. i don't understand how care's can do that. We always send any clothing @ toys we have brought for the child, weather they have been with us for 2 years or 2 weeks. It is hard enough for a lot of these children moving around a lot, let alone not having anything they can call their own.
- Backpacks 4 Aussie Kids It's just ridiculous! I'm going to post this comment thread in my blog, but I'll leave out your last names (no profile pix either don't worry), I think more people should know that this happens

What do you do when a child turns up at your place?

2011-03-21T11:05:00.002+10:00

People have asked me, "What do you do with a child that has just been dropped off at your place for care?"
So I thought I'd share some of the things we usually do. Of course, please keep in mind that this is a general overview and we change things according to how many kids we take and their personalities and ages etc.

It often starts like this -
4.20pm ~ring, ring~ I answer and this is how it goes, "Hi Des, this is such and such from Families Plus, how are you? (general chit chat for a min or so, and then this - ), What's your capacity to take a placement of a (age, gender, number of ), child?"
Then I say, "Why are they in care? How long have they been in care? Why are they moving placement? How many times have they been in care? How long will the placement be? When does the placement start? (usually asap), Plus a whole heap of other questions to which the worker either answers as honestly as she can or says she'll find out. And then I always ask, (because it's a small town), would I know the family?"
Once I've got all this info I let the worker know that I'll call my partner Bruce and get back to them. Bruce is usually flat out at work so we have a bit of a conversation and a think about how we can handle a placement right now, consider the things going on in our lives and make a decision, yes or no.

So, let's say we decide yes!
I call the agency back, let them know and then I make sure I have a backpack for the child and run to Coles to get some child friendly food, (because unlike popular belief, some foster carers don't have a neverending supply of lunch snacks, poppers and tempting desserts always on hand). I bolt home, make sure the child's room is ready with fresh sheets and the backpack and toiletries on the bed along with a teddy and their new torch.

It's now 5.10pm.

About now I realise I haven't cleared the dining table off for dinner, (because my partner and I eat in front of the tv when we don't have kids and use the table as a dumping ground for 'stuff' lol), so I do that. I tell the dogs and the cats that we are getting a visitor and have a handful of treats ready to keep our AmStaff calm. She adores kids, but it can be really overwhelming for a little person to see a big dog all excited.

5.30pm

Bruce is home by now and we talk about what to expect. We make dinner and wait.

5.50pm

A car pulls up in the driveway. The dogs go nuts and I give them treats and shut them in my office or on the patio.
Out of the car jumps a little person with a bag full of Maccas, (thanks for that dear social worker or whoever you are). We are introduced, my cat Capt. Jack rubs up against the little person, which usually breaks the ice.

The Capt. and Bruce

5.55pm

The social worker, or random drop off person leaves, and we are left to work stuff out.
If there are bags, Bruce and I show the LP to their new room and help them unpack, (the cat likes this part also). By this time the dogs are crying and I tell the LP what to expect. I go and get the little dog first and introduce them. Then I get the big dog and put her in a sit/stay while the LP has a pat, then I send her off to her mat while we finish unpacking.
Of course, the whole time we are chatting and talking about which draws to put things in and 'Oh, that's a cool shirt!, or 'Can I wash some clothes for you?" We look through the backpack and then we say, 'We'll be just in the kitchen making dinner, you can come out when you are ready'.

Mr. Woofy

Kairo, (or Rosie as we call her), looks scary huh?

Milo, terrified of little people for some reason and hides the whole time, lol!

6.30pm

I like to give the LP some time alone, but where they can hear us, to process. Usually the animals go and get the LP and we all have something to eat. Then because it's getting late, bath time and quite time before bed. We show the LP how to get to the toilet, we practise with the lights off and use the torch and we show them how to get to our bedroom and knock on the door really loudly!

I always to the first bedtime routine, unless we specifically have information that a male should do it. I have this great set of books called, 'I feel loved', 'I feel sad', 'I feel jealous' etc. There are 7 or 8 of them. We go through the titles and the child can choose a couple for me to read. Yes, even if they are 11 years old I use the same set of books.

We had one LP who chose the book, 'I feel angry', for the first three nights, on the fourth he chose, 'I feel loved' . . . the next day he was reunified with his family.

I've made a quick vid of the story, it's not great filming and there are no special guest star voice overs.. just me! I am camerman, crew, and narrator... the editor had the day off :o)

8 - 8.30pm sometimes later depending on how hyped up the LP is.

I ask if the LP wants a light left on, a lamp left on or the door open etc. and I check on them every 5 or 10 mins till I go to bed.

We don't really sleep that well on the first night.

6.30am or earlier

Bruce is first up in the morning and he does breakfast and the teethbrushing and getting dressed for school or day care or whatever. (I am not a morning person at all! lol).

At some point before school, I ask the LP if they'd like to go to Kmart after school to buy some new pjs, (or whatever I can see they don't have or may soon need replacing). I NEVER throw anything out that the child brings with them. These things are their only belongings and they BELONG to them, not us. Buying new things is a nice bonding experience for both of us and I make sure they know that they now own these things, because they usually ask anyway :o(

8am ish

I walk with the LP into school, visit the office to let them know I'm caring for such and such. The school is usually the last to know. Then I pop over and visit the teacher and let them know and encourage them strongly not to expect too much homework or even quality school work until things are settling down again. Sometimes the teachers take my advice, and sometimes they don't.

9am ish

I go home for a nap LOL! I wish! These days I have to go to work, but last year I was able to take a breath and organise a menu and lunches etc. and chase up my agency for all the info they have, if the DOCS worker hasn't called me by midday I call them and insist that I get the 'authority to care' forms by that afternoon.

I must say, that the agency I'm with is awesome!! Very helpful, friendly and supportive and I'm so glad we joined with them. Usually we get a call from our support worker or sometimes a visit the same night the LP comes to stay (yes, out of hours... imagine that!) or the next day.

If you have any questions or comments or you are a carer and do things a little differently, please leave a comment below.

Again, this is a very general outline.

Book Review.. Twilight

2011-03-20T11:00:00.002+10:00

Stephenie fans! What makes her so special to you? – “…Seriously, her writing is just so awesome. The books are like drugs!...” http://thetwilightsaga.com/group/stepheniemeyerfanclub/forum/topics/stephenie-fans-what-makes-her –

Does anyone else find it disturbing that an official fan site openly compares literaure to drugs?

I had not heard about Stephenie Meyer and the Twilight series till 2008, when I read an article in Time Magazine (http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,1734838-2,00.html ). I am an avid Harry Potter reader and J. K Rowling admirer, so the title of the article caught my notice. Having read through the article I was still not much interested, though my then teenage daughter had her fantasy caught.

She borrowed the book from a friend and raced through it, immediately developing her love hate relationship with it. I was intrigued by her ravings and her determination to lay her hands on the rest of the books. I read the first 100 or so pages of Twilight, and simply could not read through the rest I was so revolted.

All of Stephenie Meyers books became sensational in their fan following. Movies were made. The media was alight with senseless stories of screaming fans wanting to be bitten by Robert Pattinson who starred as the lead vampire in the stories. I felt vaguely disturbed when I heard that mothers of teenagers, women in their 30s and 40s and even 50s were reportedly “getting hooked on to” the books. There was something very wrong about the scenario, but I did not take more than a passing notice of all this.

When I started writing for these pages, and was asked to review books, I decided to go back and read the series. I thought I would give it another chance, since the popularity does not seem to have waned. I read Twilight and this writing will refer to only this book, as I do not want to read the whole series.

Let me begin by referring to a book that has already dealt with this phenomenon of young women going berserk about unrealistic novels.

It is part of received wisdom that Northanger Abbey is a satire on Gothic tales of horror. … M. H. Abrams, in A Glossary of Literary Terms (1999 ed.) under 'Gothic Novel' remarks that Jane Austen 'made good humoured fun of the more decorous instances of the Gothic vogue in Northanger Abbey'. (Read more: http://www.jasa.net.au/sensextde99.htm#story4)

Published nearly two hundred years ago, Northanger Abbey by Jane Austen is the story of Catherine Morland, and ordinary young girl of 17, who has had neither wisdom, nor the benefit of formal education. She has built up an idea of the world through her vast reading of the many Gothic Novels that were popular during Jane Austen’s time. She has had a strict moral upbringing, and a very practical minded mother, who has so many children that she has not been much able to attend to each of them individually. Left to formulate her own view of the world, Catherine has formed the habit of relating all she sees to the unnatural Gothic world between the covers of her favourite novels. She is too unassuming to hold forth her own opinions, or even to formulate them independently. It is a clever story of a girl who learns to form her own opinions from observation, who learns through the embarrassment of experience that life is not lived within the pages of the popular romantic novels she is so fond of. She even learns to reach conclusions of her own, make her own decisions and become her own woman. Edward Tilney (supposed to be Jane Austen’s voice in the novel), who becomes her husband, makes the distinction between reading a novel and believing it literally, and in reading it and extracting such truths from it as enriches one’s life. He makes Catherine aware of the difference of reading blindly, and reading with discernment.

Image via Wikipedia

Jane Austen was in her early twenties when she wrote Northanger Abbey. She later reworked on it before her death, and it was published posthumously. Jane Austen was mostly home schooled or schooled by family members, and spent a year at a formal school. She grew up in an age where women’s rights were still a novel idea and possibly read Mary Wollstonecraft’s works on feminine liberation and equality. Though she never refers to them in he works, her own notions, and that of her characters reflect an understanding of, and impatience with the female destiny in her day. She died when she was 41, and packed her life with wisdom, wit, intelligence and a contribution to literature, that is relevant and deserves attention even today. (Read More: http://www.jasa.net.au/jabiog.htm)

Twilight, on the other hand seems to be a celebration of unthinking romance, with emphasison unthinking. The author, Stephenie Meyer, with a degree from Brigham Young University, and all the independence, freedom, choices, and equality enjoyed by women in the 21st century, Wirtes a book that in a standard Australian school would get pulled up on each page because of grammatical errors and poor writing skills. She creates a heroine who though “independent” and self sufficient enough to take over and run her mother’s household and life, and her father’s household when she lives with either of them, falls apart when the stunningly handsome, impossibly strong and, may I say, completely weird Edward does not come to school one day. Bella, an impossibly awkward girl, who cannot even drive in a straight line, unless she is very careful, looks down upon her hapless parents, who are cardboard cut outs of real humans, thinks of all her schoolmates as small town non- wonders, is inexplicably bedazzled by an impossibly beautiful face. Virtually at first sight. Once she does admit her feelings for Edward, she thinks of him as a “god”, and wonders about what he would have been as a “young god”. In the end I was left wondering whether anyone in the book, and even Stephenie Meyer really understands what love is all about. There seems to be no depth to the feeling that love brings. In the story “love conquers all”, but the form of love that is described seems more like an addict’s dependence on drugs.

Yes, the word “impossibly” occurs many times in the previous paragraph. The characters are truly impossible.

Let us look at the characteristics that make Edward a hero: He is inhumanly strong, incredibly handsome, with a sculpted body, has a “mellifluous” voice, can move like lightning, has a grace that is naturally lacking in all the other true 17 year olds around him. He has all these qualities because he is a vampire and lusting after Bella’s blood. He falls in love with her because he is attracted to the smell of her blood. He likens his need for her as that of an alcoholic to cognac, or a drug addict to heroin. Of course let us not forget that he is 118 years old, and presumably has had a couple of lifetimes experiences. Bella finds it attractive that he lusts after her blood and is constantly aching to drink her blood and kill her.

Once Edward and Bella declare their love for each other, they stay together ALL the time. When she sleeps, he sits in a corner and watches her. The only time they separate is when Bella needs her “Human minutes” (read bathroom and shower breaks). They kiss and canoodle continuously, but do not have sex for reasons that are only hinted at, and when Bella, in a surprisingly coy manner asks about it, she is told in no uncertain terms that it was not on the cards. Is this an implicit message of no sex before marriage stemming from Ms Meyer’s religious background? But wait, Ms Meyer does not want to send any messages. She just writes for herself. “I never write messages. I always write things that entertain me, and one of the things that I find really enjoyable to explore is the idea of love.”

(Read more: http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,1834663,00.html#ixzz1GcJhGbuO)

. “I didn't write these books specifically for the young-adult audience. I wrote them for me. I don't know why they span the ages so well, but I find it comforting that a lot of thirtysomethings with kids, like myself, respond to them as well--so I know that it's not just that I'm a 15-year-old on the inside!” Really? Real life15 year olds in the 21st century behave like Bella with their real life boyfriends? Wow! If Stephenie is to be believed, so do the thirty somethings! Do they really like to be petted and cosseted and taken care of continuously and do they really want to be entwined around their new found loves 24 hours a day? Sorry, except for when they need to wash!

I wonder that millions of readers and (gasp!) their mothers have been reading these books and swooning over it. The small sample of readers I have spoken to, seem either to hate it, and spent a long time just getting angry over the book, or to love it: a book shop owner, recommended it saying, “it is like those age old romances like Jane Austen and all, nothing really happens, but there is this underlying tension, so there is no, you know, .. all of that…” No, Madam Bookshop Owner. It is not like Jane Austen. And no, I do not agree that “Nothing happens” in Jane Austen’s books. Though I know that is not what you were saying.

I plead with all of those who have read and gone maniacal about the Twilight saga, book and films, to turn back and read those novels written by women in a bygone era. Please read the books that have survived the centuries and are now groaned over as school texts. Perhaps a good place to start will be “Northanger Abbey”: the story of the girl who had to learn the hard way that life was not a Gothic Novel, and that she had a mind and a soul. The story in which a girl had to grow up and know herself before she could be happy in the love of another.

Books of Stephenie Meyer: The Twilight Saga: Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, Breaking Dawn, all of which have been made into films which have proved immensely popular.

And lastly The Host.

The Most Well Known Books of Jane Austen:

Pride and Prejudice, Sense and Sensibility, Emma, Mansfield Park, Northanger Abbey, Love and Friendship.

Post Script: My daughter has not read Breaking Dawn, and only half of Eclipse. She has outgrown her love of the books, and has moved on to other literature, with no prompting from me at all. I recommend people to make intelligent choices for themselves, and if their choice leads them to the Twilight series, even after they have read and assimilated other books and literature, then so be it.
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You can read more of Sonelina's work here http://bodhimoments.wordpress.com/

The aftermath . . . (& PTSD)

2011-03-03T21:10:00.000+10:00

My last blog on Post Traumatic Stress was closely followed by Tropical Cyclone Yasi (category 5), that hit an area from Cairns to just south of Townsville.

The most badly damaged areas are Tully, Mission Beach, Cardwell, Tully Heads and Hull Heads. These places either need a complete rebuild or a rethink of the positioning of the houses and roads so close to the shore. To give you an idea of where I am in relation to these places, it’s just a 40 min drive to Tully from here and and hour to Cardwell.

It’s been such an emotional couple of weeks. I wrote about the PTSD when I did because I had concerns about the flood survivors, but it seems that something was learned from Cyclone Larry in 2006. People in the right places have realised that homes can be rebuilt and communities can be cleaned up, but once it’s all over, the residents may become depressed, or anxious or develop a fear of heavy rain or wind.

Watching all the reports on the news shows about TC Yasi and the aftermath, there has been a lot of talk about mental health as well as physical needs of the people who experienced this trauma.

My partner Bruce made the decision to leave Innisfail for this cyclone. I wanted to stay . . . desperately. I have no idea why, I just wanted to be here. I couldn’t talk my dad into leaving with us, so I was worried about him in part, but I really wanted to stay.

Bruce insisted and I wasn’t going to let him go anywhere without me, so we packed up three dogs, two cats, (in one carrier), and one of his aeroplanes and headed off to Mackay at midnight the night before the cyclone hit. I should explain about the aeroplane. Bruce has three planes and a half ownership of a hanger at our local airport, but it’s almost impossible to get insurance for these things. If the Cat. 5 had hit us, the hanger and his planes would have been trashed.

The morning we left, (Tuesday), I couldn’t eat and I was sure I was going to vomit. I hadn’t slept since the previous Saturday when we realised the cyclone was heading our way. The whole town was really tense and on edge. We knew what a Cat. 5 meant if it hit us. The lady at the checkout in Coles had tears in her eyes as we talked about how there was very little tinned food left on the shelves.

People in Innisfail lined up to get petrol all day on Tuesday, every plastic storage container in the town sold out, as did batteries, candles, bottles of water and most of the tinned food. We knew how to prepare this time.

Residents of the other communities who had ‘been through Larry’, thought we were all being paranoid and a bit over the top. But we lived through the last ‘aftermath’.

I think that what the other towns didn’t really understand was . . . Larry hit Innisfail head on. It flogged us for 5 or 6 hours at the most and then it left. Yasi was headed right for us (again!) and was predicted to have Cat. 5 winds near the eye for 12-18 hours. If that had happened there would be nothing left standing.

As it happened, Yasi turned just before landfall and hit right below us at Tully, Mission Beach and Cardwell. Innisfail would have got winds at about a high Cat. 3. We lost most, but not every banana plant this time. Few, but some, houses have damage and lost roofs, but not like last time.

During Larry, Tully had almost it’s whole banana crop standing, which tells you that Larry was a small and concentrated hit, while Yasi flogged the living daylights out of a 500km radius.

Cyclone Larry, 19th March 2006

Cyclone Yasi, 3rd Feb 2011

My heart goes out to the communities worst affected by this horrendous storm. I am still in disbelief at the size and ferocity of it.

It’s going to take a long time for the people in these areas to come to terms with what happened.

My nightmares have started up again and I wasn’t even here to have that terrible howling noise of the wind in my head . . . but still, I can hear it. I’m having dreams where I’m just afraid of something, or nothing, I can’t explain. I’m not dreaming about cyclones, but I can’t say I’ve slept properly since before it hit, even though I seem to be sleeping every chance I get.

I know these are symptoms of the anxiety and panic now, so I am more able to understand them and let the feelings flow through me instead of trying to pretend I’m ok and keep my mind too busy to be able to think about the ‘hard stuff’.

Just like I set time aside each day to meditate, I set time aside, (just a small amount), for me to think about the things that are worrying me in detail. I let my mind go for it! All the bad things that can or could or may happen float through my head . . . but I just watch and listen to them. I am working on not personalising them or dwelling on them, just letting them happen and accepting them as thoughts and not reality.

Of course, I’m not always successful. For instance, it’s nearly midnight and I can’t sleep. I’m having trouble switching off my brain to the ‘what if’s’ at the moment. Writing about it will help, I’m already yawning and feeling ready to try to relax again.

I went to meet my new boss today and the teacher I’ll be working closely with this year. I was very open with them about my melt down and my recovery. Not sure if they were shocked or interested or could care less or maybe they were just worried about how I’ll cope at work. It doesn’t matter to me, best to be honest and open about these things. After all, we did just have another cyclone and there’s more to come yet I’m sure!

It’s been nearly a month since I wrote the post above. I still haven’t had a good nights sleep since before the cyclone and don’t really expect to until cyclone season is over.

For some unknown reason they sent the army away AGAIN after only two weeks. All the communities that were less affected still have piles of green waste and household damaged items sitting out the front of their places. The more damaged areas still have masses and masses of work to be done.

The insurance agencies are insisting that contractors from NSW, Brisbane and VIC do all the repair work and are also replacing white goods and furniture with items purchased and shipped from Melbourne and Sydney!!!

Never mind that the Premier said this wouldn’t happen.
Never mind that the local businesses are missing out on a chance to employ locals and keep the local economy afloat.
Never mind that the elderly now have to hire people to clean up for them.
Never mind that the natural disaster relief money ($1000 per adult) still hasn’t been given to those who applied just after the cyclone, and the list goes on . . .

I don’t understand. Someone I know was chasing up Bob Katter today. I hope he can help. This situation is nuts.

Anyway, I’m going to post this blog now. But I’m sure I’ll have more to say!

Oh, and we only lost about 20-30% of our donations. The Overflow in Innisfail where we store most of our stuff held up pretty well. Phew!

Guest blogger Sonelina - Diary of a Wimpy Kid Review

2011-02-11T08:41:00.005+10:00

Please welcome Sonelina to our blog. She will be reviewing books and offering opinions in the months to come -

Sonelina with daughter Picorelli and son Preethom

Sonelina is a mother, avid reader, and a player with /lover of words. She spends her time helping people improve their health, reading Georgette Heyer and Deepak Chopra voraciously (vicariously?!) and convincing her son that his life will not end if he does some extra homework. When she’s not holding down the fort in her sweltering tower aka apartment, she can be found dancing Indian style, guzzling down warm water and laughing with her friends. She loves people, really. And reads more authors as well. Long rambling walks clear her mind and helps her buckle down and get on with it.

Diary Of A Wimpy Kid – The Down To Earth Truth

“has taken the word “reluctant” out of “reluctant readers”. US Post.

The series “Diary of a Wimpy kid has taken the world by storm. Almost. Not a phenomenon by the Twilight series standards, or by the Harry Potter series standards, nevertheless, it has revolutionised the world of reluctant primary school readers who have found that reading a book is not so uncool after all. A whole generation of teachers and parents have heaved a profound sigh of relief that here are books that they may happily allow children to read, and that children like.

It is a look at life seen through the eyes of a tween - Greg Heffley. A run-of-the-mill boy. A boy whose distinction lies in his average-ness. And his wimpy-ness as he calls it. His tendency to tumble into trouble regularly, his impractical ideas which he tries to bring into fruition, his social problems and blossoming adolescence, all are readily identifiable, and instantly grips the reader. Greg is often selfish, kind of careless and very self centred. Hovering between juvenile delinquency and angelic perfect-ness, his escapades and philosophies are all the more believable as everyone has some memory of similar chaos in their lives.

There is a ghost of a story sticking each journal (Not a Diary) into a book, and deals with topics like : summer holidays – “Dog Days”, or growing up - “The Ugly Truth” Discipline - “The Last Straw”, Each book is 224 pages of a diary, with very expressive cartoon pictures drawn in by Greg, giving the books a distinction uniquely its own.

Originally envisaged as a comic strip for adults, then as a book for adults, as a nostalgic and humorous look at their childhood days, the books have a skeletal comic strip appearance to them, and to their contents. The author, Jeff Kinney’s original dream of being a syndicated comic strip author got modified into what rapidly became a popular book series and is now a movie by 20th Century Fox.

Jeff Kinney works as a virtual world designer. He is the design director of a Boston Based Internet Publishing company, where he created Poptropica.com. Visit either www.poptropica.com or www.funbrain.com to see many fun things for children to do, as well as the Diary of a Wimpy Kid online series. Then he comes home to spend “five hours under a doona” to construct a single gag line for the books.

The success and greatness of the Diary of a Wimpy Kid series lies in the fact that children and especially boys, who I am told take to reading less easily than girls in general, can read them easily, and have a laugh. Not designed to be a role model, he gets into hilarious situations, often of his own making, often as a hapless victim, and does not always come out squeaky clean and victorious. But he learns little life lessons, and thus moves toward teenage and adulthood armed as well as the next average child.

Any reading is good reading in order to encourage the habit, and the Diary of a Wimpy Kid works really well. Reluctant readers find hilarity in the books, strong readers would like to race through them, budding artists and authors would have no problems sitting down with a “journal” of their own to get started on

their own masterpiece complete with drawings and humour. The simplicity of the books make them a masterpiece.

I would not go so far as to say “Move over Harry Potter” along with Andrea Yeats, but the best seller lists definitely have Greg Heffley up there on a par with the boy wizard. I thoroughly recommend the books to children between 9 and 12.

Guest blogger Richelle

2011-02-04T10:05:00.006+10:00

Introducing Richelle!

Richelle is a full time mum of two girls aged 2 and 4 years and she's also a Stampin' Up!® Demonstrator. She runs regular card making classes and lives in the beautiful state of WA!

As you can see from her pic, she's pretty cute . . .

This is the first blog Richelle has done for us, so please leave some feedback either here or her blog or facebook page.

I hope you find something fun to do from these blogs!

des :o)

One of our Favourite indoor craft activities.

Crafting has been runs in my family, between my Mum , Sister, Nana and Aunty and I, we are competent sewers, knitters, cardmakers, scrapbookers, folk artists and a few other things thrown into the mix. So as an extension of my love of craft (and wanting to keep my brain active and hopefully make some extra cash when I had my first child), I joined Stampin’ Up! I love it as I get to share my love of crafting with family, friends and also lots of new people I meet.

One of the things about being a Stampin’ Up! Demonstrator, you buy their products and for me, that includes a few of their punches. I love how easy they are to use and this activity revolves around getting your child to use them. Yes they are that easy! So here are some details about one of our favourite activities when it’s too hot or wet to play outside.

What you’ll need:

· Craft punches in all sorts of shapes and sizes. If you don’t have any craft punches you can buy pre-cut shapes from most craft stores or el cheapo stores

· Find some card or paper. Scraps are perfect! But you’ll also need 1-2 big pieces per child/project

· Glue – I use blue gluesticks as then you and your child can see how much glue they are using

· Textas, pencils or crayons

What to do:

1) Punch out lots of shapes in all your card and papers. If you place them in a box as you go, you’ll have somewhere to store them if they aren’t all used. Miss 4 is able to use my punches, but Miss 2.5 doesn’t have the co-ordination just yet. Young kids get a thrill from picking up the shapes and putting them in a box – it gives them a job whilst you are punching out more shapes.

2) Today, I’ve helped out by mounting 1 large piece of card on another contrasting piece of card to ‘frame’ their work (this can also be done right at the end).

3) To help them out, I’ve drawn some flower stems for Miss 2.5 and a heart border and a flower outline for Miss 4. The idea is to glue inside the flower outline and for Miss2.5 to make flowers at the top of each stem.

4) Let them draw any thing with the textas, crayons and pencils – do this before any glue is applied to the page.

5) Hand you child a gluestick! Scary thought! But it’s ok, if it gets on the table, the glue will come off with some spray cleaner and a sponge (or babywipes are priceless!). Also, I try and remember to place some large paper on the table to protect it, or buy a plastic tablecloth from your local craft shop.

6) Now you’ll just need to supervise and try not to interfere too much. Just watch and see where they need a hand.

Soon you’ll see the finished results and the look of sheer joy on your child’s face when they present their artwork to you!

For more details about Stampin’ Up! or to see any of my other work, please visit my blog here.

Take care,

Richelle

Townsville Project!

2011-01-28T12:10:00.000+10:00

Trish Lovedayhas been a foster carer in Townsville for over 15 years . During this time she and her partner have provided a home for over 100 children.

These placements have included short term of 1 or 2 nights right up to long term placements including a placement of a sibling group for over 9 years.

In 2009 Trish and her partner were the North Queensland Recipients of the Foster and Kinship Excellence Award in recognition of their dedication to fostering.

Trish has been actively involved in many different aspects of fostering within her local community and has a passion for providing children entering out-of-home care placements the opportunity to feel safe and protected.

When not engaged in different roles of being a foster carer, Trish is an active committee member of La Luna Youth Arts, and has an interest in many different aspects of the theatre.

Here you can see that Trish and her team have been busy, collecting, sorting and packing!

A prize for writing, a prediction?

2011-01-26T14:01:00.003+10:00

The day Cyclone Larry hit us, I won second place in a writing competition with this short story.

The Cyclone

She sat. Unbelieving eyes staring through the shards of glass still clinging to the window frame. Her breath came quickly now, the smell of sodden earth saturating her nostrils. Sickness welled up inside her rigid torso. The vomit came suddenly and violently, no longer trapped within her will. The young woman let it go, she let it all out. Vomit, tears, screaming, beating the floor with her fists, shaking, trembling and then finally nothing. Could it really be that she felt nothing. What about the man at her side? She looked down at him. No, there was nothing, no feeling, no love, just nothing.

She put his hand over his chest and tried to stand. Her legs were still wobbly, so was her head for that matter. Her long dark, matted hair fell over her shoulder and into her tear soaked eyes as she forced herself off the floor.

Finally upright, she was able to take stock of the damage to their home, at least, it used to be their home. She looked at her husband again. His face looked so peaceful. Like a deep sleep. He’ll wake soon, and then they can start to rebuild their home, their lives.

As she walked through the house towards the back door she heard a yelp, then a cry and then another yelp. Oh God, the dog!

She moved as fast as her tired brain would let her, manoeuvring over broken furniture and slushy, sludgy water. It got deeper towards the back door. That damn creek never did empty properly when there was a big wet.

Pushing the tangled hair out of her face, the young woman stood on what was left of the back steps and listened. Yep, there it was again that yelping and wait, was that splashing? Yes! Over by the shed she saw her beloved mongrel dog crying and clawing his way onto the guttering.

“Hey boy! Come on, here I am!” The sound of his mistress’s voice visibly excited the little animal and from somewhere he found the strength to swim into her waiting arms.

“Oh, baby I thought you were a goner. I told you to stay...” she roused, but just barely. They were both happy to be safe and held. “I’m gonna put you down now darling, just stay close to mummy ok?”

Once inside, the little black dog ran through the slushy water into the master bedroom to shake himself dry and to roll on the bed sheets. But a horrible shock was in store for the small refugee. There was no warm dry bed, no soft doona or fresh carpet to roll on. Everything in the house was drenched and in disarray. Confused, the dog ran to find his mummy.

He found her sitting again by what was left of the front window, next to her sleeping husband. The little doggie was careful not to wake the boss; he’d nearly drowned and didn’t want a smack as well. Instead he climbed into his mummy’s lap, turned around three times and cuddled in for a well-earned nap.

Absently she stroked the creature. He was warm, wet and shivering but he’d be o.k. As she stroked the dog she reached out and took her husbands hand in hers. It was cold. Maybe she should get him a blanket, but they were all wet. He’d have to wait; he’ll be right while he sleeps.

Sleep, hmm if she just closed her eyes for a moment everything would be alright. She was safe, it was over now surely. Everything was so still and quiet. Not even the sound of rain in the distance.

Her eyes closed – There he was. Damn he was handsome. She felt like the luckiest woman on earth. Look at him in that Hawaii shirt and the chain of plastic flowers around his neck, such a dork, yet the love of her life. He had chosen a brightly coloured shirt covered in lovely dark haired women wearing nothing but grass skirts and coconut shells. He’d said they reminded him of her, dark hair big breasts. He’d gotten a playful slap across the cheek for that comment, especially in front of her father!

She was wearing an orange and yellow sarong and exactly the same type of chain of plastic flowers around her neck, not to mention a huge smile and overwhelming feeling of love and delight. She was finally marrying the man she loved. The only man who made her feel special, beautiful, intelligent, happy and most importantly . . . loved. When he smiled so did she, when he was sad so was she, when he was tired or angry or happy or anything at all, so was she! It was good to be in love.

What a perfect day this was to be wed. The beach was shady this late in the day and the pelicans were using their magnificent bills to find that last feed before bedtime. Looking out over the water the couple could see the tell tale signs of small bait fish being chased by something larger. They watched as the water bubbled and rippled over the small waves as a stingray leapt out of the water and splashed down in the middle of it’s prey. The waves fell gently on the shore as the tide slowly crept its way in.

After the ceremony the couple was joined by various necessary people for a brief photo shoot before the light faded. A pink sunset concluded the afternoon’s events as everyone retired to the marquee for drinks and a barbie. It was nothing fancy, but it was the happiest day of their life together so far. Perfection, even down to the old school friend and his band they had hired to play during the reception.

Of course they wouldn’t accept cash, but they did drink their fair share of free alcohol during the evening. The couple’s first dance together was unforgettable. ‘Till there was you’ was the newlyweds special song, chosen by him which made it all the more special for her.

He was her best friend, lover and now husband. What a beautiful life they had to look forward to, and what a beautiful place they had chosen to live.

Both of them had grown up in the ‘big smoke’ down south. It was cold and damp, rushed, crowded and unhealthy. Here, in this small seaside town they had found peace and harmony. They were glad to have made the move, quick to make friends and even quicker to fall in love with the lifestyle. Laid back, quiet, relaxing, neither of them missed the traffic or the noise.

They felt like they had found paradise.

“Sarah! Sarah! Mick … are you guys in there?!” Shaken from her dream they young woman clambered to her knees, forgetting about the dog, her husband and her exhaustion.

“Dave, is that you? We are in here, in the front room,” Sarah called out the front window through the broken glass to the elderly man in her, in what was her front garden.

“I’m coming up, just you stay put. Where’s Mick?” Dave had already begun to move the small boat towards the place where the front steps used to be.

“We’re o.k, I found the dog but I haven’t seen the chickens anywhere. I hope the chickens are alright.”

Dave tethered the tinny and climbed into the damaged house. Sarah reached out for his arm to help steady him and found that it was she who needed the steadying!

“Love,” said Dave,” you need to sit down.” The pensioner helped her to the floor and tucked a knotted mess of hair behind her ear. He looked her over and decided that she was uninjured. Sarah managed a weak smile and forced back the tears that had started to overflow again.

As Dave looked around he noticed Mick lying by the front window. He smiled at Sarah as he called out, “Hey, fella. You got yourself a good woman here, very brave. Mick?”

“He’s sleeping,” droned Sarah.

Dave walked the few paces to where Mick lay. Comprehension dawned on the old man’s face. He knelt by Mick and patted his hand, “It’s o.k mate. We’ll look after her for ya.”

“When he wakes we’ll have to start cleaning up,” Sarah’s voice sounded miles away. She was staring out the front door.

Dave just nodded, “Sure love. How about we get you into some warm clothes and I’ll come back for Mick a little later.”

Without looking at him, Sarah stood and headed towards the boat. The dog was already there, asleep on the life jackets. Sarah climbed in while Dave undid the rope.

Silently her friend pushed away from her house, her husband and headed down the street.

The young woman did not look back.

Post Traumatic Stress

2011-01-23T14:02:00.000+10:00

This is quite a personal post and it's been prompted by the flood disaster.

In March 2006 our town, Innisfail was hit, bashed and smashed by Category 5 Cyclone Larry. Our town was devastated by not only the cyclone, but by the 3 or 4 months of continuous rain and storms afterwards. Not light showers... rain, wind and more rain.

I distinctly remember yelling at my partner and my stepson for going for a sightseeing drive after the cyclone had passed. They took photos of the destruction and I refused to look at them. I should point out that my partner was checking on his place of business.

I busied myself with cooking on the gas bbq and making sure we had enough drinking water, looking after the school guinea pig (which I'd just got for the kids the week before, and which was renamed Larry that day), my little black mongrel dog and worrying about my cats and chickens that I'd had to leave at my house, (I wasn't living with Bruce at that time).

During the cyclone I think I was in a daze. I couldn't sit and watch the debris fly past our front door like the rest of the people in the house. I just sat and hid and rocked behind the couch.

We lost nothing really. Our roof stayed on and we only had one window crash in.

But to say I was terrified would be an understatement. I really, really thought we were going to die. I know people say that all the time, but until you actually feel it, you just can’t imagine the fear, the smell of fear, even the sound of fear . . . your whole body tingles and trembles with it.

The worst was to come however. Eventually I did have to leave the house to check on some relatives and friends. I did have to drive through the destruction on a daily basis on my way to work.

I was expected to 'counsel' the students at the school I was working at. I was expected to clean up the school grounds, my home, my partners home and somehow keep it all together.

It was like moving in a dream.

I broke down one day and yelled and screamed at my stepson, (something I had never done before), and burst into uncontrollable sobbing. Obviously there was something wrong with me, but I didn't know what.

Every time I drove to work past all the flattened banana plants and sugar cane, past the dump trucks and fallen trees, past the houses that had literally exploded and via at the work crews on the roads, I would feel sick. I was trapped in a nightmare.

And the really stupid thing was, I was fine, my house was fine except for some water damage, wet carpet and some fences down. My partners place was fine, my dad’s place was fine.

My best friend had to move her young family from the caravan park they were holidaying in to her parents house . . . which lost its roof for a while, then when the wind changed direction it slammed back on again. My
partners sister and her family lost everything as their house blew away from around them while they huddled under a mattress in what used to be the bedroom. Several of the kids at school told me of how the walls of their home ‘flew away’ or their roof ‘went up’ in the sky. Parents were shaken and teary as they dropped their kids off for the day, and I was supposed to reassure them!

I had ‘survivors guilt’. I just couldn’t understand why I could possibly feel so stressed when I was ok and unhurt, we had our home, a generator, food and unfortunately we were able to make the tv go each night for the news updates.

I say unfortunately, because that was the last thing I needed to see.

So, I guess this was the beginning of my anxiety and panic disorder. Pretty sure it all started off as
post traumatic stress. I had nightmares every night through the constant wind and rain for months after the cyclone, being expected to counsel children and parents through their ordeal and receiving no counseling myself.
Just the act of traveling to work over the next year through all the devastation and the painfully slow rebuilding and clean up process was putting extra pressure on my nerves.

Image via Wikipedia

By the start of March the next year I thought I was really turning into a ‘fruit loop’. I couldn’t bare the
drive to work anymore, but I did it. When the storms came in the arvo I cringed, but I got through it. Little things at work started to get to me. I couldn’t make a decision without second guessing myself.

I stopped sleeping and starting drink 4 or 5 coffees a day with 3 or 4 sugars just to get through the day. We started eating baked beans on toast several times a week for dinner and in the end my partner just did the cooking while I lay on the couch or cried in the shower.

What was wrong with me?!

I carried my work with me everywhere I went, but it never got done, (not to my high standards anyway), and eventually I wound up crying through the Huggies commercials and could no longer watch Neighbours because it was too stressful!

I lost weight, I put weight on, I slept a lot or hardly at all, I loathed myself for being so weak and wanted to hide in my room with my cat. But I didn’t, I just kept on going . . . until I couldn’t go on anymore.

I took leave from work, saw a doctor and went on an overseas holiday with my partner (which we’d had planned for months and was the best thing I could have done). I took more leave when I got home, which wasn’t very helpful as I just sat around the house and in the end, I couldn’t even leave the house without having a panic attack.

I went back to work, without receiving any proper medical treatment and by the end of the next year I had had another melt down.

The good news is, once I did get proper medical treatment . . . and yes people, that means a ‘shrink,’ I started to get better.

Ok, my shrink doesn't look quite like this , but you get the idea!

It’s been a long road, but I’m better now. Not cured, just in remission. Like a cancer, the type of illness I had needs to be monitored and lifestyle changes MUST take priority so I can stay healthy.

Am I ashamed to say I had a mental illness? . . . nope. I am pissed off that I didn’t take better care of myself and it’s probably the same reaction I’d have if I was in remission from cancer.

If you see yourself in any of this story, please go to your doctor and talk to them. More importantly, don’t downplay your symptoms, insist on seeing a professional counselor and then later on if you need to, see a shrink. There are free programs your Dr. can put you on.

Of course, this is only a very vague summary of what happened to my life. There is much more, much deeper stuff that went on.

I’m writing this for the people who survived the floods and fires and any other catastrophe to say – it may take 6 months or a year, but if these symptoms start appearing in your life, don’t dismiss them, get help.

It’s so true that in times of need we can pull together to get through it, however it’s the aftermath that we may need to be looked after.

Post Christmas clean up

2011-01-09T13:23:00.001+10:00

Image via Wikipedia

How was your Christmas? Lots of fun and busy, busy, busy? If you have kids, did they get inundated with lots of pressies? I bet they were excited! I love it when Santa comes to visit :o)

So.... what are you going to do with all the toys the kids don't want anymore? Please don't tell me you are going to bin them! Consider donating the ones in good nick to your local charity shop or foster care agency, (no junk though, these kids have been through enough).

Personally, I'm a bit of a 'bah humbug!' when it comes to Christmas. It's starts way to early for me, like - October! Just as Easter apparently has begun with the eggs already on shelves in some places.

I'm all for the Christmas spirit, but I really think it should be all year round. I'm pretty sure that's what the bearded guy who died on the cross was after. (I went to a Catholic school, but I'm not Catholic, more Agnostic).

Maybe the shops start Christmas so early because they think the Christmas spirit should start earlier as well! Doubt it though LOL!

It's the blatant marketing to the kids that really gets me. Fair enough if you don't subscribe to the fella upstairs but still, I think the whole idea of 'giving' at Christmas has been lost. For kids it seems to be about 'getting' the latest whatever it is and chucking a tanty if they don't get it under the tree!

So I have to ask, do you encourage your kids to make or purchase Christmas presents for family members or friends? If they get pocket money, do they buy mum or dad a gift (with help from the other parent obviously) and wrap it and put it under the tree?

When I was a kid, Dad would 'secretly' give me and my little brother $20 to buy something for mum, and Mum would 'secretly' do the same thing!!! (we didn't get pocket money and still had to do our jobs!).

We did it! Goal Smashed :o)

2011-01-06T01:00:00.001+10:00

Look!

We did it!

Actually we've packed 1230 backpacks!!!

New goal!

Thanks to the Perth Project who packed 500 backpacks all on their own! The Townsville Project has packed about 100!
Of course this doesn't include all the little extra bits that get sent to the agencies like shoes and toys etc. as well as toiletry packs and towels and school backpacks for our local youth shelter.

While I'm really chuffed at this achievement, it still saddens me that this needs to be done at all. It does, however, continue to amaze me just how generous people are. None of this could have happened without you... the reader! You became an active participant in our goal and you are a big part of the reason we have been able to help so many kids in care.

Thank you :o)

Get him to the Greek . . . What the?!

2010-12-16T21:12:00.000+10:00

Ok, so the last couple of weeks of this school year I was chatting with the year 6 and 7 students at the school I was working at. Just chatting about stuff, important pre teen stuff, like who fancies who and what movies they think are great etc. when the movie 'Get Him to the Greek', was discussed.

The kids (11 and 12 year olds) assured me it was 'awesome' and that I really should see it. They raved about how funny it was and how the characters get up to some 'cool stuff'. So I thought I'd watch it.

Now, maybe because I knew the 11 and 12 year old kids had already seen the movie, or maybe because I have just out grown that sort of base degrading humor, (although I'm sure I was never into that kind of thing), I just couldn't find the movie funny at all!!!

The blatant use of recreational drugs, the sex scenes that really didn't leave much to the imagination and the full on stupidity of the movie just made me feel sick.

The whole way through it I kept thinking, 'the kids at school have seen this, the kids at school have seen this'.
I just can't believe a parent in their right mind would let a child under the age of consent (that's 15 and 16years) watch this movie, supervised or not. It was the most inappropriate thing I've seen in a long, long time! Even as an adult I found it stupid.

I realise the target audience was probably males aged 18 -25 or something but seriously! And the amount of publicity this film got. I actually thought from the previews and the interviews that the movie might be a bit of a laugh.

Look, I'm just so annoyed at parents who let their kids watch this stuff. It allows kids to see drugs as fun and sex as a game and gives them the whole wrong idea of how to form relationships. I'm not against one night stands.... but not at 13 years of age. Which does happen, and where do the kids with babies end up? That's right folks - foster care, youth shelters or on the street.

I hate when I go to the movies to see an M15+ movie and there are 10 year olds in the line in front of me who buy tickets and get in, no questions asked. I've seen parents with toddlers take their kids to see violent movies and I have to say.... you had the kids, suck it up and get a baby sitter or wait for the dvd.

Can you tell I'm pretty passionate about this?

I just stomped my foot for extra effect.

Kids just don't have the reasoning skills and the comprehension skills to realise that these crazy storylines are for show and not how life should be if you want to be successful.

Anyway, enough ranting.
Does anyone agree with me? or am I just over sensitive?

How hard is it?

2010-11-21T12:53:00.000+10:00

How hard do you think it would be to be a child in care? I've been asking myself this recently. I've seen so many different types come through our doors since we started caring. Some seem happy enough to just go with the flow, from home to home, others cry and are upset and others are very angry and want their mum. We've had to call the police on one occasion and had a 7 year old try to run away down the main road and just about got hit by a car. We've had distraught kids, well behaved kids and happy kids.

But they all share a common theme . . . an underlying sadness and confusion as to who is their mum and dad and when or if they will be going 'home' wherever that may be. Sure the kids can be distracted with a new school, new bedroom and of course our cats, dogs and chickens keep them entertained. But really it's just a distraction.

What is going on inside their minds? All of a sudden they have a new 'aunty and uncle' as well as everything else they have to cope with. They are expected to just trust perfect strangers with their well being and safety, and for the most part they do.

Personally, I don't think I would have coped as a child in these circumstances, but I was never abused or needed to be removed from my parents care. I could read, write and spell and did well at school (even though I didn't like it) I never swore at a teacher, threw a chair or hit a teacher or another student. I never threatened to kill anyone or hate myself enough to want to end my own life.

Yet for thousands of kids and teens all over Australia these thoughts, feelings and actions are taking place.

Without an army of dedicated 'strangers' to care for them and attempt to show them a 'normal' life who knows what would happen to these youngsters? Our future.

I've seen kids come into our home with not only one of our projects backpacks, but with other care packages as well and I know they've been in and out of care several times in one year.

When I pack the teddies in the bags I always say a special little something to them. I hope the message gets through.

October was busy!

2010-10-30T11:12:00.000+10:00

These are just a couple of the piles of mail I've been getting! I usually wait till the weekend now to open everything LOL!

That amount of mail arrives at least each week, sometimes more. I'm always so touched and moved by the generosity of the people in our Australian community. Some packages cost $20 or more to send, but I get them on a regular basis from several people. You should know that the items go to our storage area and are sorted regularly and packed as needed.

Opening the packages is great fun and I set aside a special time to do it, because I figure if people spent time organising donations, packing them and heading off to line up at the post office, the very least I can do is take some real time out to appreciate it all. I used to take lots of pix but as you can see from the quality of some of these photos, my camera is on it's last legs and I really can't afford a new one right now.

So, I know it's been a while since I blogged.... so here's what's happening! I've gone back to work 3 days a week, initially in the prep class but for the last six weeks of term I'm filling in in all grades across the school to give teachers extra time to work on report and catch up on non contact time etc. As a teacher myself, I bet the teachers are very excited to have this extra time at this time of the year.

Other than that I've been sorting all the undie donations into packs of 3 in size and gender!
I've used about 650 plastic zip lock bags and because I really feel bad about all that plastic, I've bought cellophane bags for the rest. (it's biodegradable!)

Also went to the local Family Care meeting to collect donations!!!

I promise I've been busy LOL

Just to finish off this blog, here is a pix of a kids bike that was dropped off to me. I was able to give it to a 3 year old girl who had just come into care with absolutely nothing of her own. Wish I could have been there to give it to her myself :o)

Perth Project Underway!!!

2010-10-12T11:53:00.000+10:00

A couple of months ago a lovely lady by the name of Susan Merriman got in touch with me about the possibility of helping out the project in some way. She'd been considering starting something similar in her area. We had several chats via email and Skype and her enthusiasm for the needs of the kids seemed to match my own!

So off she went, made contacts in her area, sent me her resume and described her plan for helping the kids in need where she lives.

This is her!

Here’s my story so far...

About two months ago a friend of mine emailed a group of us and asked us if we would all donate some children’s underwear to an amazing friend of hers who was running a wonderful organisation called Backpacks 4 Aussie Kids. I looked up her website and read what it was all about. I was so amazed and touched by what Des was doing that my initial reaction (after crying) was to try to get as many backpacks together and donate them to her.

So I rang Des and had a long chat with her...it was during this conversation that I realised that not only was no one that she knew of was doing this over in WA but also what an achievable thing it was that she was doing...so I decided that I would try to start it up here in WA.

My husband was away at the time and being the more practical one of us his first reaction was, ‘And where will we store all of this, Sus?’ (our house is tiny), but by this stage I had already sent out my initial email to everyone I knew asking for help, ideas, suggestions and, most of all, donations!

Well, they came in thick and fast...along with being put in touch with a wonderful lady, Bev...who got hold of some new and very cool backpacks! A beautiful girlfriend of mine made me up a flyer and I was on my way...set to start packing!

Over the next few weeks my phone rang hot with people wanting to help and/or donate. I had one phone call from a guy who had read my email through a friend of a friend and asked me if I knew of a website where I could buy backpacks in an auction. He rang me again half an hour later to say that he had bought me 20. They arrived today!!

I packed for three days and with the amazing help of a friend who popped in to drop off her donations, saw what a pickle I was in and stayed for four hours helping...this morning I was able to deliver 72 packs to Fostering Services. What a feeling!!

Three little helpers came around this afternoon, and with their help another 30 backpacks are waiting to be delivered. Great work, girls!!

I am hoping to go far with the backpacks, just as Despina has done in Queensland. My venture so far has only confirmed my thoughts that community spirit is as strong as ever...people really want to be involved in their community and help others in need.

Sue has now packed over 100 backpacks for kids in need!

If you are in W.A, Perth or nearby or anywhere really and want to help, please email me at despinaparakas@yahoo.com.au or comment on our facebook page http://www.facebook.com/backpacks4aussiekids and I'll pass on your details to Sue.

Final Week for Project Underpants - 964 undies have arrived!!!

2010-10-02T11:01:00.001+10:00

This project was the brainchild of Indi from {Kid}Independent.
Everything was arranged and organised through this site and through the fan page on Facebook.

Indi enlisted the help of various online businesses who donated some fantastic prizes as incentive for undie pledges!

Don't forget that all the undies sent in are going into backpacks for kids going into foster care

Here are the final few prizes on offer . . .

First up, if you’re going to wear your knickers outside your shorts, you can really only get away with it if you look the part. So our fabulous friends at DressUps are giving away one of their awesome handmade superhero capes. It comes with a bright red super symbol screenprint, and matching eye mask for keeping your identity secret.

Next up, representing the amphibian superhero community, it’s Oliver the Frog! This little green machine is handmade by the folks at “and the little dog laughed” and proudly provided by our buddies at billy lids. He’ll arrive on you door step with his very own handmade mini superhero cape, ready to join you on your crime-fighting adventure.

Last up today is “Wild Willow”… she may appear all sweet and serene on the outside, but at night time she dons her superhero paraphernalia, and protects the world from evil forces. She has superhuman strength, stamina and agility and her secret weapon is the ‘power-hug’. She’s 100% handmade by the crafty folk at Cuckoo for Coco and comes with her very own mini polka dot superhero cape.

The Project Underpants winners will be drawn next week and names will be published on this page and in our 7 October news. I’d like to send another BIG thank you to all of the wonderful Project Underpants sponsors. Be sure to drop by and visit their websites to show your appreciation for their generosity.

Jada helps out!

2010-09-27T16:47:00.000+10:00

The following post has been written by a very enterprising young lady who has visions of starting her own charity next year. Young Jada has asked to help do some fundraising for the backpacks project, (all her own idea) and is finding out how our organisation works.

Hi My name is Jada, I am 11 Yrs Old and in Grade 5, I am always looking for ways to protect our environment and ways to help others who are less fortunate than I am.

I have had some practice at school with projects this year and setting up Poverty Hour at school for a project, so the other kids could see how homeless people live.

After working on these projects I asked my mum if she could help me set up a charity similar to one I saw in America, helping foster kids by collecting much needed supplies in suitcases, that’s when my mum told me about Back Packs for Aussie Kids and we phoned Despina to see how I could help her Charity.

I have set myself a goal to fundraise 250 Toothbrushes and tubes of toothpaste by Christmas, I have currently collected approx. 30 of each and still have a long way to go.

I would like everyone to help me reach my goal by sending Brand New, unopened Toothpaste and Toothbrushes to My mums business address.

Jada Kyle

3 Abernethy ave

Deer Park Vic 3023

Thank you Despina and Backpacks 4 Aussie Kids for giving me the opportunity to help little kids in Foster Care.

Jada

Why I became a teacher . . .

2010-09-25T21:46:00.000+10:00

This vid really encompasses why I became a teacher and why I do what I do now with the backpacks. Watch it to really get to know me a little better. I was one of those kids that hated school, took all the sickies I could and refused to participate in science because I felt I already had a good understanding and what they were teaching wasn't going to be useful . . . turns out I was right LOL. I became a teacher and more importantly an early childhood teacher to give the kids the best introduction I possibly could to education.
My first lot of year one kids are now in grade 10 and 11 and still come up and hug me in the street.

Project Underpants Week 4!!!!

2010-09-24T09:54:00.000+10:00

Ta Daa!!!!! This is the last week of the {Kid}Indepenent Project Underpants and boy oh boy has it been successful or what!?!

Over 600 pairs of undies have turned up at my place with another 400 pledged!

And really with these awesome prizes on offer, I can totally understand why! … Each pair of underpants you donate to the Project Underpants campaign gets you one entry into the draw. Plus the person or group who donates the most pairs will win a $150 shopping spree from our friends at Whimsy Child. For full campaign details, please click here.

On offer this week are the following -

Handmade by our friend Caleena from Little People Clothing. She’s made entirely out of a pair of white cotton socks with woollen hair, hand embroidered face and hand crocheted knickers and slippers… She’s soft and stuffed and ready to be loved!

Next is a handmade lavender heat pack from the crafty Leah at Vintage Chenille. It features an adorable retro dolly print on super cosy vintage chenille fabric and is filled with rice and Australian grown lavender flowers.

This vintage eeny teeny cotton knit bikini was hand knitted by our friend Elizabeth from Knit Baby. It’s from the Knit Baby Spring Summer 10 “Cool Cotton Collection”.

Lastly we have a hair clip holder, handmade by Nat from Quirky Kids. Constructed from an original hand drawn design, it’s handcut, sanded, painted, decoupaged, sealed and finished by hand.

And finally . . . a great big giant THANK YOU to Indi from {Kid} Independent for organising the undie drive for us and canvasing to get all the fantastic prizes on offer. Thank you also to the wonderful Indi handmade designers for donating such awesome prizes as well!!!!

Project Underpants Week 3 !!!!

2010-09-19T20:39:00.000+10:00

Week 3 already!!! and I have to say O.M.G!!! So far 336 pairs of undies have turned up at my place.

The postie is starting to give me some strange looks as he leaves half a dozen or so packages on my back steps daily and the back deck is pretty much covered in donations, (again!).

{Kid}Independent has organised three more awesome undie themed prizes. This week it's Y-Fronts! LOL! Everyone's favourite kind of underwear.

Firstly we have the coolest coin purse that you’ll spy this year! These one-of-a-kind wacky y-fronts are completely hand stitched from reclaimed felt by our good friend Cintia from My Poppet. So cool!

Secondly, four knicker sticker packs from Sissy Sparrows. These colourful sets are perfect for creating hilarity on school books, diaries or scrapbooks. Each set is handcut from original illustrations and features a variety of y-fronts and frilly knickers.

(and my personal fav!!! I am an unashamed cat lover)

Lastly, is an original 8×10″ print by Noosed Kitty. Indi spied it recently on her travels and couldn’t resist snapping it up to add to the prize pool. It features one very brave kitty and his fabulously hilarious superhero mask. I mean, really, who HASN’T attempted to fight crime with knickers on their head… we’ve all been there…

Now just a quick reminder - for every pair of undies you donate (that actually turn up at my place) you will get one entry into the draw!

Winners drawn October 1st 2010, PLUS the person or group who donates the most pairs will win a $150 shopping spree from our friends at Whimsy Child. For full campaign details, please click here.

So, get your pledges in and your undies sent asap to be in the draw!!

Facebook Ponderings . . .

2010-09-12T22:26:00.001+10:00

Thought this little discussion was worth blogging. Love to know your thoughts . . .

From Facebook Sunday night the 12th Sept.

(I have removed everyone's last names)

Backpacks 4 Aussie Kids We had our monthly meeting today for B4AK and unfortunately, but not unforseen, our first disagreement about the contents of the bags and what is essential and what is not. Here's the list of the basics that go into the bag, just comment with anything on the list that you don't think is essential - that means, if it do...sen't get donated we purchase it. See comments below for the list
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Backpacks 4 Aussie Kids
Bag contents -
torch, toothbrush/paste, shampoo/conditioner, soap, hairbrush, facewasher, pjs, clothing, soft toy, activity/toy and or book, undies, blankie.
I haven't included nappy bag contents here. Just kids/teens. Like to know what you ...think and why. If you are a carer and have an opinion and would like to identify yourself, please do so.See more
2 hours ago · LikeUnlike · 1 personLoading... ·
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Emma
I can't see anything wrong with what's in those bags. Although for teens they would probably need deodorant.
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Sally
im guessing if it comes down to having to leave some things out id choose the soap, shampoo and conditioner. 99% of homes would have these items anyway. But on the other hand its nice for them to have there own
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Kel
I was thinking perhaps a blankie might not be as necessary for an older kid as a younger one - i'm not saying get rid of them but maybe put something more age appropriate in the older kids bags, in exchange for the blankie - beanie perhaps ...or scarf???
Otherwise i think everything is necessary!!!See more
2 hours ago · LikeUnlike · ·
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Zoe
I too think the blanket might not be needed but maybe some deodorant or a journal/diary
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Leah
I think it all sounds good, agree with Sally re the soap etc but nice for them if able to get it, and would probably be cheaper/easier for a book than a additional toy? What a great great thing! :)
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Nicolle
i work in a resi with boys age 10-18 and our welcome packs are exactly the same except we have deodorant like emma suggested.
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Ajaye
I'd prob take the facewasher out and torch, is the torch for those scared of the dark? maybe a glow in the dark toy? or maybe a small nightlight instead? but yeah i agree with the teens need deodorant.
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Erin
Maybe sanitary products for those around the age of puberty- puberty is a scary thing but to have to go through it when you have such an unstable life would be difficult- they might not feel comfortable asking and I think it is an essential for teens. IMO :)
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Ajaye
lol we aren't taking anything out we are adding more!
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Tammy
agree need deoderant and sanitary product for older kids. maybe take torch out, i would only have a blankie for babies/toddlers
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Ang
I love the diary/journal idea!! Also the deod and sanitary products. ♥
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Tarnya
I think the content are perfect with the addition of deodorant and sanitary pack for the girls. A torch can help a young one feel more secure particularly if they have to navigate a new house to go to the bathroom. Shower products may not s...eem necessary but for a child or teen that has been taken out of a familiar environment it is nice to have something of their own. I think a journal and pen or coloured pencils is a great idea because feelings need to be expressed and either drawing or writing about them can be a way to cope. Great idea.See more
about an hour ago · LikeUnlike · 1 personLoading... · ·
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Tarnya You may be able to get in touch with a company that makes the sanitary pads and ask for them to donate sample packs. You can go onto the website and order a sample so I can't see why they wouldn't donate a large number of packs
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Belynda
@tarnya awesome ideas :)
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Machelle
I am a carer and I would say ditch the shampoo and conditioner. Carers are also trained to deal with teen girls and any puberty issues that arise so I wouldn't worry about sanitary products either. Everything else is great and I would definitely keep the blanket even for teens. I always buy my kids their own "special" blanket and they really do love them.l
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Backpacks 4 Aussie Kids
thanks everyone. Yes, teens get deodorant :o) We haven't included sanitary pads because we pack in sizes and not ages. For eg, we cared for a 7 year old girl who was a kids size 14-16. I'd hate to put pads in and have a child that age end u...p with them, could be awkward all round. If we donate direct to youth shelters we would include them though.
Interesting that people are saying that soap etc is not essential. When I originally came up with the idea, I wanted the bags to be like an overnight bag for the kids, (and a help for the carers), and yes carers probably do have those things in the house and they could probably leave the light on instead of a torch etc. But it's not about what the carer has...for me it's about what we can give the kids. Unfortunately it's come down to money for us and unless we can get some corporate sponsorship or grants happening soon I can see me working at least one day a week just to fund stuff for the packs LOL, yes, my partner knows - he already thinks I'm a bit nuts but he understands my passion for this.
Our project team works really hard to make sure we get everything we need, we just needed to make a decision on how to spend our funds. The meeting was great and we are gearing up for the cent sale and had a beautiful lunch...which is the main thing right :o) ♥ to the team and everyone who commented.See more
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Backpacks 4 Aussie Kids
thanks Machelle!
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Leah
Would there be any chance of hitting up some major motel chains (or the like) that may possibly donate some of the travel size shampoos etc? :)
about an hour ago · LikeUnlike · ·
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Backpacks 4 Aussie Kids
You'd think they would wouldn't you Leah?! Anyone work in a large motel and want to give it a shot, please go for it!!!
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Jane
I'm guessing that the chains buy them from HOtel supply wholesalers. I have an ABN so will do some looking into it for you! s
about an hour ago · LikeUnlike · ·
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Leah
I have just emailed you something to read....let me know what you think :)
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Ricky
I think trying for corporate/bulk donations for travel size bathroom stuff is a cool idea - will ask my friends if any have contacts that could help. Basically I think the list is perfect, if finances mean you *have* to trim it back then I'd trim back the blankie for the largest sizes (ie: generally older kids) and possibly the facewasher (on the grounds that no kids I know actually use them) but I do think keeping everything if at all possible is the best solution.
about an hour ago · LikeUnlike · ·
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Kathi
Johnston Maybe a book and a pen, tissues, personal items for teenage girls, deodorant. You're doing a fantastic job anyway. The world needs more people like you. xxxx
56 minutes ago · LikeUnlike · ·
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Leona
Same thought about soap - houses generally have them. I've asked a friend who's hubby's a dentists to see if he can get some small toothpastes I can send up!
31 minutes ago · LikeUnlike · ·
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Michelle
Try Libragirl.com ....i used to order lots of pack for puberty classes in schools...they were great!!!
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What can I say? Our fans are the best! Lots of interesting opinions here and I still haven't given mine or said what the team decided, but still, great to see people are able to be involved with what we are doing!

Apparently I'm quite stubborn, (it's genetic...I'm Greek!), but we, the Greeks also invented democracy, so I'm happy to go with how we voted today at the meeting.

Will let you all know in the next week or so.
des

Project Underpants Week 2!!!

2010-09-09T11:45:00.002+10:00

{Kid}Independent supporting B4AK

Well, I was sitting on the living room floor the other night opening packages and counting undies, (a little like the Count from Sesame Street, except I wasn't wearing my cape), and I realised that we have had over 260 undies pledged in just the first week of Project Underpants!!!

AWSOME!!

And that doesn't even include the several people who are rounding up donations from friends and family before they send theirs!


This is our adopted cat Milo (or Ianto as we trying to re name him, he doesn't really come to either!)

Currently we have enough undies to pack about 900 bags (that's 3 pairs of undies per bag), but we are really needing boys undies and sizes 12 - 16 for both boys and girls. (A women's size 8 or medium is a girls size 16 and a man's size medium is a boys size 16).

Pop on over to {Kid} Independent to see the prizes on offer this week!

To inspire your undie pledges this week, we have three fabulous prizes to add to the prize pool. Each pair of underpants you donate gets you one entry into the draw. New prizes will be released each week throughout September {winners drawn on 1 October, 2010}, plus the person or group who donates the most pairs will win a $150 shopping spree from our friends at Whimsy Child. For full campaign details, please click here.

Firstly, Louise from The Little Humbugs draws her designs in pencil, and then colours them digitally. The finished product is printed using high quality archival paper and claria inks and is then matted, ready for framing. This little cutie looks like she’s taking master duck for a splash in some puddles!

Next up we have Billy in his y-fronts and Bella in her frilly knickers. This delightful pair are hand crocheted by Rosie from Rosie’s Bears and Bitty Critters. Each one is made from acrylic yarn and stands approx. 25cm tall. I don’t know what it is about y-fronts, but they always make me giggle!

Our final prize today is from the crafty studio of Steph from Mon Petit Poppet. Sporting a red and white polka dot bikini, this handmade dolly is off on vacation to the beaches of St. Tropez. She’s looking for a stylish fashionista to take along with her… cocktails at sunset anyone?

A big thank you to all the Indi handmade people who have donated to the prize pool!

And thank you to all the people who have pledged undies!

Time to vote again!

2010-09-05T17:07:00.002+10:00

It's time to vote for those Kids in our Community who are 'doing their bit'.

Caleb

Caleb recently participated in his first ever 40Hr Famine.
Caleb is 13yrs old, and it was his own decision to 'go without'.
Caleb didn't just go without food though, he decided to go without Technology as well.
Now, this might not seem like much to you or I, but, Caleb is one of those Kids who enjoys his TV, Games & Music.
He set about planning the weekend with gusto. He planned games and activities to occupy his time, and he did the Famine with a friend, so they had each other to lean on.
Caleb unfortunately suffers from Childhood Migraines, and lo and behold, one developed on the Saturday night while the Famine was in full swing. The only way to relieve this is for rest, medication and food (as it is likely that the lack of food attributed to the migraine). So, Caleb had to eat. It was my decision, not his, but he accepted that this was necessary for his health.
He could have just ended the whole shebang right there, but he didn't. He continued with his 'fasting' from technology into the next day, and even longer than initially planned because he wanted to make up for having to eat before the 40hrs was up.
Caleb's goal was to raise $300. A nice modest sum. To this date, Caleb has raised approx $100. He is extremely proud of himself, as this amount of money will go a long way to help children in 3rd world countries.
I am proud of Caleb for wanting to do something selfless to help others. He is my (big) Little Hero!

Ruby

I would like to nominate Ruby. Ruby was diagnosed with lung cancer at age 7 and is now 9 and in remission. She has raised over $6000 for the Oncology Children’s Foundation through her efforts to bring a team to the Gear Up Girl Sydney cycling events each year for the past two years.
Ruby has lost half of 1 lung, but doesn't let that get to her.
Last year, 6 months after Ruby's surgery, a follow up scan showed no sign of Cancer in Ruby's lungs.

India

India is a year 4 student, who has a passion for design and social awareness, and it started early. India has launched her own special line of personally designed bags, Butterscotch Kids By Caidia, and all proceeds are going to be donated to Australia's homeless, and to raise awareness of the issue amongst children her own age.
India clearly gets her great sense of charity from her Mother Kate, who has her own Bag Range, and recently donated $1 from every Messenger bag sold to the homeless charities throughout Australia.
India has been able to visit Chinese manufacturing houses, so she has seen homelessness at its worst, and she was shocked to discover it occured in Australia too, so she decided she wanted to help.

You can vote for one of these amazing kids at the Family Capers forum.
Such a hard decision to make!

Each monthly winner receives a backpack full of goodies from the project team here at Backpacks 4 Aussie Kids just to say thanks for being you!

Sorting Morning

2010-09-04T16:43:00.001+10:00

Another beautiful day in Innisfail. Hot, humid and drizzly. Someone forgot to tell the weather gods that it's Spring!!!

It was about a billion degrees in the warehouse, (unless I just hit menopause), and our little pedestal fan just wasn't cutting it!

Nevertheless, three dedicated members of the local Salvos turned up to help sort the clothing into sizes and then into sets. Our project secretary Tracy was also able to help out for an hour or so before taking her little girl to a birthday party. Remember when birthday's were something to look forward too!?!!

We spent a good two hours setting out the clothing and then bundling up sets, (that's a top and a bottom) with the size marked on it. This will make stocktaking run much more smoothly. When the sets are put into the correct boxes, each has a stocktake form on the front of it - like so:

This means that I can go in and pack at anytime and know exactly how many of each sizes we can cater for. As you can see, if clothing is taken or added to the boxes, it's all noted on the form. That's a lot of mucking around I hear you say . . .

Yep! It takes quite a while to set it up. But since our next goal is 10,000 backpacks it will pay to be organised :o)

All in all, I was standing in the heat on the concrete for about 5 hours! I stayed after the others left so I could open more boxes of donations and do a few other things. But I have to say that without the help of the Salvos this morning never would have happened!

des

Project Underpants Sept 2010!

2010-09-01T10:26:00.001+10:00

{Kid} Independent has organised a series of prizes which have been donated by our fabulous friends and sponsors. There will be three new prizes released each week during September, so check back each Thursday to see what’s up for grabs!

To be eligible for the prize draw, your undie donation must arrive here, at the Backpacks 4 Aussie Kids HQ on or before 30 September, 2010. For each pair of undies that you pledge/donate you will get one entry into the major prize draw.

Plus, the person or group who donates the most pairs of undies will win a $150 shopping spree from our friends at Whimsy Child. Hooray!

How do you start?

Start collecting your knickers today …
Add “undies” to your weekly shopping list …
Tell all your friends about the campaign …
Share on facebook, twitter, blogs, etc …
Get your Mum’s group, or work place in on the action …
Package up your undies and make your pledge before 30 Sept …
Wait with bated breath to see if you’ve won!

*Special thanks to Amanda from Style Collective for her assistance in promoting this campaign, and to all of our prize sponsors for their awesome prizes. Don’t forget to drop by and visit them to show your appreciation for their generosity.

And of course thank you to {Kid} Independent! for coming up with this idea and organising EVERYTHING!!! So wonderful to have support like this.

BBQ fundraiser at the Overflow!

2010-08-31T21:55:00.000+10:00

I think the following video footage tells the story completely!
We had such a great time, raised money and ate our sausage quota for the next 11 years.

QCWA Rocks!!!

2010-08-30T15:45:00.001+10:00

It was my absolute pleasure to be invited to speak at this years regional QCWA conference at Kurramine Beach (about 40 mins from where I live). There were ladies there from Mackay out to Sarina and up to the Cape!

The local divisions of the QCWA have been wonderful supporter of Backpacks 4 Aussie kids since I started the project last year. The ladies have made blankets, teddies, dolls, cushions and all sorts of other things for us to include in the backpacks and nappy bags.

What can I say about these women? Well, let's see . . . for a start, not one of them was over 25 (mentally!), they were all passionate about being members of their divisions and helping their communities, yet realised that we are all part of a bigger community - from town, to state to country!

This group of highly motivated women of all ages and walks of life really know how to come together and support each other and the more needy people in their areas.

The meeting this year covered everything from proper protocols to follow at meetings, to a self esteem workshop and a Tai Chi training session.

A beautiful woman called Terri was waiting to greet me as I pulled into a car park. The very first time we met I discovered that she was the daughter of my 'Brown Owl' from when I was a littley in the Brownies!

Terri has always made me feel so welcomed to the meetings, as have all the ladies. I feel no age difference, except I think that some of these women have more energy than me!

I was treated to a coffee before my talk and of course I had scones with jam and cream afterward! You can't go to a QCWA thingy without having scones, it just wouldn't be right! (I think it's actually illegal)

I was only a little bit nervous about this presentation and I felt it went well, with lots of questions after and some really generous ladies who sneaked cash donations into my hand. As well as this the ladies loaded up my car with lots and lots of donations for the backpacks.

Several women came up to me and confessed they had tears in their eyes while I was talking about how little these kids in care may have. Some have experienced it first hand, having cared for neighbours kids and other kids not in 'official care', or growing up in a house where their parents cared for other peoples children.

I had such a lovely time chatting with the ladies, as I always do, that I was sad to leave. Hopefully I will get the chance to go to one of their craft mornings soon.


Anne from Babinda Div

Dr. Phil!

2010-08-19T14:41:00.000+10:00

Image via Wikipedia

I was watching Dr. Phil for a little while yesterday and on it were these people who had adopted a child from an overseas (ie, not American), orphanage. There were three women on the stage and a few more in the audience who were sharing their experiences.

It really struck me that these people were dealing with issues that we as carers deal with all the time, except we get training and support (if you know where to look and who to ask!). So the gist of the show was that children who are not given that initial love and bonding opportunity with an adult, be it parent, carer, nurse or worker in an orphanage all seem to have trouble forming long lasting suitable relationships with others as they grow.

The label for this is 'Reactive Attachment Disorder'. Very basically the child is unable to form appropriate social relationships. From being completely withdrawn, violent and angry to being overly familiar with complete strangers. For example, going into a strangers house, whether it be a carer or a carer's friend or family friend they haven't met before and just making themselves at home. Checking out the fridge, helping themselves to food, turning the tv on and flicking through the channels. Or they may hug or talk to strangers in the street or sit on strangers laps and think nothing of it, (which brings up the whole Santa Clause issue, but that's for another time LOL).

Reactive attachment disorder (RAD) is described in clinical literature as a severe and relatively uncommon disorder that can affect children.^[1]^[2] RAD is characterized by markedly disturbed and developmentally inappropriate ways of relating socially in most contexts. It can take the form of a persistent failure to initiate or respond to most social interactions in a developmentally appropriate way—known as the "inhibited" form—or can present itself as indiscriminate sociability, such as excessive familiarity with relative strangers—known as the "disinhibited form".

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reactive_attachment_disorder

This disorder can stem from not receiving appropriate adult contact during infancy and early childhood. This basically means, not enough cuddling or responding to cries of hunger or loneliness, not because the workers in the orphanages don't wants, they just can't give all the kids in their care the attention they need.

Image via Wikipedia

As a teacher I've seen plenty of kids who have been unable to form appropriate relationships with their peers and with adults alike. Most of the kids we've shared our house with have been very, very comfortable to be here and showed no signs of stress. However, I now realise that this lack of outward stress can indicate something more going on inside. You think they are ok and settled and then without warning there is a tantrum or a crying fit or something that seems to come from nowhere.

And then I got to thinking, yes, as a carer and a teacher I do have access to training but what about the parents of kids with severe behaviour issues? Do they have access to respite? Do they even realise they need respite or what is going on with their child (biological or not)?

You probably all know at least one family who has a 'problem child' or a 'black sheep of the family'. That's the kid no one really wants to invite to the birthday party or have for a sleepover. I totally understand and can relate!

Imagine how their parents feel. Oh, they'd probably never admit it because they 'cope' and make the best with what they have.

I'm not saying these kids all have a some sort of disorder, not by any means, just that it's nice to be supportive of other parents in our community. You all know my little motto by now . . .

It takes a village to raise a child

Overall Being Shopping Disount

2010-08-17T13:23:00.001+10:00

I want to announce something very special that Overall Being is doing .....Head over too the website and see how YOU can help Backpacks 4 Aussie Kids raise funds to help children who go into Foster care and Kinship care.

You can help Backpacks 4 Aussie Kids fill backpacks and nappy bags for kids going into foster and kinship care just by purchasing an item from this page! You know you will get a quality product from Overall Being and at the same time a % of the profits will go to our non profit group. So go ahead . . . shop till you drop!

Any ZOOBIE / GAIA product from the range listed on this website 20% of profits will go back too helping Backpacks 4 Aussie Kids fill much needed and important Backpacks and Nappy Bags for children of our future going into foster and kinship care.

So how do you order? Overall Being likes to personal online shopping. So once you have worked out which items you would like.....email Lisa with the following code B4AK's Order. This will alert her that 20% of the sales goes directly to us.

OR if you already know what you would like click on the following link and an email will automatically open up for you to place your order.........Let's go SHOPPING!

One Chance at Childhood

2010-08-13T11:29:00.000+10:00

Image via Wikipedia

One Chance at Childhood was supposed to provide a stable home environment for kids in care under the age of 4 years who were on long term orders or in their second and third short term placements.

It would have meant that these kids would have had a place and a family to call theirs. They would have known where they were going at the end of each day and who they were going home to.

When the One Chance at Childhood (OCC) initiative was announced by former Child Safety minister Margaret Keech in February 2008, she said if families involved with the new unit failed to address their parenting issues within 12 months, the department would cease reunification plans, recognising the importance for children of a stable, safe home environment and a loving relationship with a carer.

Courier Mail 6/11/2009

But the program has been scrapped.

Too hard basket I think.

How do you tell a parent that they can never have their kids back?

Who supports that parent through the permanent loss of a child that they love, (yes they do usually)?

Communities Department director-general Linda Apelt and current Child Safety Minister Phil Reeves said there was no 12-month deadline applied to parents, who through the OCC program have access to intensive specialist support and remedial services.
"Child protection is complex and it would be inappropriate to attempt to restrict families' opportunities for reunification where they are clearly working with departmental officers to ensure the safety of the child," Mr Reeves said.

Courier Mail 6/11/2009

This policy was developed after a lot of consideration and much research and thought. Why dump it?
How long is long enough for parents to get their act together and be considered suitable parents again?

I can tell you, the amount of paperwork and screening as well as household safety checks and psychological profiles that my partner went through to be carers was just nuts. But, I understand it was necessary to see that we were 'fit' to look after someone else's child. Bruce (my parnter) did point out however, that he's already raised two of his own kids and wasn't required to go through any screening process!

How long do you think parents should be given?

How many short term placements is too many for a child under 4? (a short term placement is anywhere from one month to two years)

How many times should the child be placed back with the parent and then taken into care again before enough is enough?

There is so much research out there to say that children develop appropriate emotional responses to situations and people in very early childhood. Moving them around delays or prohibits this entirely!

My grandparents fostered two boys. The boys were 7 and 9 I think when they came to them. They received the same love and care that their own kids would have got. They were in care till age 18 and always welcomed home whenever they turned up. They were assisted financially and emotionally during their first years away from home, (which was only when they needed something). I'd like to say this story has a happy ending, but it doesn't. I don't even think these two people know their carers (my grandparents) are dead.

I'd like to think these kids would have had a better chance of forming a bond with their foster parents if they had been able to be adopted or been in care at a younger age.

Who knows though?

Love to hear some of your thoughts in the comments section about this post. I'm tempted to say that all kids who have been in care for a certain amount of time under the age of 4 need to be adopted. But I have my doubts.

des

The Backpacks project gets more backpacks!

2010-08-11T21:13:00.003+10:00

40 backpacks donated by local shopping center in Cairns FNQ

RAINTREES GIVES BACK(PACKS)

New kid on the block, Backpacks for Aussie Kids is a local charity working to give foster kids an easier transition to a new foster home by providing each child with an age and gender specific backpack with life’s little necesseties.

Raintrees Shopping Centre recently learnt of the charity and leapt at the opportunity to donate 40 backpacks left over from a previous promotion to such a worthy cause.

“We’ve had these backpacks sitting here and thought of various ways to give them away but none of the ideas we came up with married up as well with the centre’s philosophy which is Community, Value and Convenience. Backpacks for Aussie Kids ticked all the boxes, the one of primary concern being Community. We see it as being a highly valuable cause and it’s convenient because we can give them all to the one organization ” said Centre Manager, Russell Mitchell-Smith with a wink.

Backpacks for Aussie Kids was recently established in Innisfail by two ex-school teachers who regularly saw the plight of children placed into foster care without anything of their own until their new carers had an opportunity to get to the shops.

“If we can get a backpack to each child that is placed into foster care, we can be sure they have the necessities that they deserve, things such as a toothbrush and clean underpants. We think it’s important to give these children something to call their own when quite often everything they ever knew has been left behind in disarray. A torch helps them get to the toilet in a new house, a teddy gives them something to hang onto. Clean clothes to wear to school, it’s important for self esteem you know” says Despina Parakas,, founder of Backpacks for Aussie Kids.

(this press release written by Fleur Warner)

Raintrees Centre Manager, Russell Mitchell-Smith presented the backpacks to Despina Parakasa and Jo Klein at the centre.

Jo and Center Manager Russell

B4AK supports Kids in the Community

2010-08-11T20:49:00.004+10:00

KidsZone@FC Community Hero –

Sponsored by Backpacks for Aussie Kids

Recognising our childrens involvement in the community!

The KidsZone@FC Community Hero Awards encourage nominations from the community of Kids doing their bit for the community.

Weather it is their involvement in a community group, helping the elderly, school work, charity involvement or something else that adds value to the community if you know of kids or a friend involved we want to know about them!

Each month the nominees for be profiled on the Family Capers Forums and the Family Capers Community will vote for the KidsZone@FC Community Hero. Winners will receive a prize and qualify for our annual KidsZone@FC Community Hero Presented in January 2011 at the Family Capers Family Convention and Awards Dinner.

Children who are encouraged to shine in areas that interest them might go on to build a career in those pursuits. Wouldn’t it be fantastic to know the recognition they received as a child via Family Capers helped set them up for the future?

Family Capers is contacting schools and community groups throughout the country to send in their nominations for Kids in Community. Join us in celebrating what our children can do.

Let the Family Capers Team know about what the Kids in our Community are achieving by nominating them or submitting article or artwork for the KidsZone@FC Mag by emailing kidszone@familycapers.com.au

Like to sponsor a Kids in the Community Award with prizes please contact linda@familycapers.com.au

(written by Linda Enever of FC)

Backpacks 4 Aussie Kids is pleased to be involved in this community program. We supply the monthly winner with a backpack filled with age appropriate goodies just as a 'thank you' for being you!

It's so important to let people know when they are valued and sometimes it's really easy to overlook the kids in our lives. When we are going through a hard time, so are they, just by the mere fact they are watching what's going on with us. Kids cope with lots more than we realise and I think we have mostly forgotten what it was like to be a kid.

This program has such a positive focus. You could nominate your own child for making gains in areas only you would normally see. If you are a foster carer, nominate your biological kids for this award! They are helping kids in care too.

Can't wait to see who is nominated next!

des

Inspiring People

2010-08-09T10:58:00.003+10:00

It's been a whole week since Tracy and I got home from the Connect2Mums conference in Brisbane and I'm still inspired! That says a lot about the people that were there and the orgainisation of the whole thing.
The project had been nominated for 'Best Service Site' award and I filled in the forms and sent them off, just in the nick of time mind you, because I live on the edge baby.... and because I was procrastinating!

I realise that I've been telling everyone who asks, that the conference was 'amazing, inspiring and so completely awesome!' Which doesn't really tell anyone much about what happened. The problem is, that even though we were only there for a couple of days, the whole thing felt like much longer, in a really good way.

I got to meet people in real life who until now had just been logos or icons on various networking sites. My best friends Tracy and Amanda were able to meet these people that I'd been talking about for the last year and understand why I'd been ranting about how wonderful they were.

These women, (yes, mostly women and about 3 guys were in attendance), had all started their own businesses from scratch. Some of these ladies had been through the most traumatic and soul crushing experiences, near death experiences and life changing moments that I was stunned and relieved to know that not only was it possible to move forward in your life after these events, it was imperative.

I won't relay the stories here, that is something for their personal blogs and sites, but lets just say that if you needed to find some motivation to get your life moving in an upwards direction again, the conference was the place for you to be.

Initially I was a little skeptical about going to an event like this, but I'd been invited to do a presentation and getting the word out about the backpacks is very important to me. So I went. I listened. I participated. I cried. I laughed (a lot!) and I learned.

So very many of the people we met offered words of support and encouragement and told me that I was an inspiration . . . me? I don't think so, not after hearing other life stories and seeing triumph over adversity in many different ways. But still, I thank those people, without those kind words I wouldn't be here typing this, I'd still be in bed with the cat wishing the day away.

Below are just a few of the people we met in Brisbane!

Congratulations to the winners and all the nominees.

I received the 'Connect2giving' award for my work with the Backpacks 4 Aussie Kids Project along with Dr. Lucy Burns who gives all profits from her online store Better Than Flowers to the muscular dystrophy foundation, (she has MS herself).

Connect2Mums was pretty much my first point of contact for social networking and I'm so happy to be involved and have the opportunity to know these kind and generous group of women, (and a few fellas as well).

des

Image by eszter via Flickr

What does it take to be a carer?

2010-07-26T13:00:00.003+10:00

Image via Wikipedia

It really does take some dedicated people to be foster carers. My partner and I have only been caring for kids in our home since last year, but already we've met with some pretty challenging behaviours!

Can you imagine a child you have never met before, coming in to your home, opening your fridge and just taking something to eat without even a 'Hi, how you doing?'!! Or what about talking to a child about bed time and having them ask you, 'Who is going to smack us when we are bad?' We even had a child pretend they were a dog for hours on end after a particularly stressful event that happened for her. No words, just 'woof' and 'grrruff!' She even curled up with our dogs to have a nap and would only respond if we spoke to her like she was an actual dog. These are just some of the 'simple' behaviours we have come across. I will mention more in future posts.

Obviously those things are mild, for us - not the kids. But I have heard so many stories of kids coming into care, throwing knives at their carers, screaming abuse, swearing and trashing their homes. What do the carers do? Generally they take it in their stride. They call the 'on call' help number for their agency, DOCS or the police, but once the child has settled down again, they keep working with them until they either return home or they are moved to another placement.

Some of the most horrifying stories I have heard about kids behaviour, you just wouldn't believe and that's really not what this post is about. It's about the 'why' of this behaviour.

Even if the kids don't realise it themselves, they are for the most part just plain scared.

Image by sicamp via Flickr

Scared of a new placement with people they don't know.
Scared that they may never see their parents again.
Scared they will see their parents again.
Scared they may actually like these new people they are living with but will have to move on.
Scared the new people won't like them.
Scared they will! Scared of rejection, humiliation, failure, success, happiness, love, the unkown.

And scared equals fear which can turn to anger. And what do kids or people in general do when they are angry and unable to express themselves? They lash out or withdraw.

Image via Wikipedia

Children as young as 3 can show violent behaviours towards carers, swearing, hitting, smashing things and no normal behaviour strategies that you may use with your own kids will work. You can't smack them or even threaten to smack them, you can put them in their room and shut the door, you can't even really let them out into the back yard to cool off for fear they may run away!

What do you do? You become eternally patient and understanding, take as much training as is offered and try everything you are taught to keep these kids safe and help them feel like they are wanted and loved in your home.

If the child is as young as 3 or 4 you may even succeed in helping that child have a successful future. But what if the child is 8 or 11 or 15? It's much, much harder.

In this article - Call for early care intervention, dated -27 June 2010. The UK is looking at what the costs are not just to the state but the emotional costs on the child of delaying taking them into care:

Taking vulnerable children into care earlier could save on emotional and financial costs, a study suggests.

Delays in removing such children from their families are linked with poor mental health and behaviour, say researchers from the Demos think tank.
The report, funded by Barnardo's, says the care system should be de-stigmatised and seen positively.
It says the state can pay nearly £33,000 more per child per year if they have received poor care.

I know that the departmental stand here in Australia is 'unification' all the way. But at what cost to the child? When are enough chances enough?

Please have a read of the full article above when you have a chance.

Local MP donates to the Project

2010-07-22T17:03:00.003+10:00

MP donates items to support backpacks for kids in need

Member for Mulgrave Curtis Pitt has thrown his support behind an initiative to provide backpacks to children entering foster and kinship care.
Mr Pitt said he first became aware of the initiative when he met Despina Parakas at the Cairns Baby Expo.
“Despina explained that she and her partner been looking at taking on the role of foster carers and had discovered that in many cases the children are put into care with nothing but the clothes they are wearing,” Mr Pitt said.
“I asked how I could contribute and made the pledge to supply items for toiletry bags – soap, shampoo, toothbrushes, toothpaste and deodorant.
“It can be extremely traumatic for a child to be taken into care, often without notice, so it is good for them to have these personal items to help cope in a difficult time.”
Backpack organiser Despina Parakas said she had made it her mission to fill 1,000 backpacks with essential personal items for children in care. Miss Parakas has now expressed a desire to continue the project indefinitely.
“The backpacks will contain clothing, pyjamas, a little blanket, new underwear, age appropriate toy or book, toiletries and a torch,” Miss Parakas said.
“All donations are welcome – just remember children in care can be all ages, from newborn babies to teenagers. Pre loved clothing and toys in good condition are always accepted as well as donations of brand new underwear.
“Items can be dropped off at any Overflow store in Cairns, Innisfail of the Tablelands – just look for the wheelie bin with our logo on it.”
For more information visit www.backpacks4aussiekids.org

(taken from http://www.curtispitt.com.au/2010/07/07/mp-donates-items-to-support-backpacks-for-aussie-kids-in-need/) I did not write this :o)

When I was a child....

2010-07-20T13:47:00.004+10:00

Have you ever thought to yourself . . . 'When I was a child I would never have talked back to my teachers', or, 'When I was a child I was happy to have an empty cardboard box to play with!', or even, 'When I was a child I used to play with the other kids in the neighborhood and wouldn't come home till dark'. ????

As I teacher I have often thought to myself and 'vented' to my teacher friends that I would never have even thought about saying 'no' to my teacher, or throwing a chair at them or swearing at them!

Of course, when I was a child I was taught by the nuns at a Catholic school and would cop the hard end of the feather duster for daring to talk in class. My leather shoes were always shiny and I took a good old Vegemite sandwich and a piece of fruit to school for lunch. If I was really lucky, sometimes I got to share it with the ants that sheltered in my school port ;o)

Now, when my Dad was a child, (of migrant parents from Greece), he got to go to school because he was a lucky kid. It was a luxury and not a right and most kids saw it that way. The ones who didn't fit in had jobs by the time they reached year 7 or 8 and if you were a girl you really weren't expected to finish primary school much less high school to year 10!

There were trades for these kids to learn, jobs for them to do before and after school, not for pocket money, but to help the family survive.

I think Dad finished year 10 but he always pushed himself to work and ended up managing many businesses (including his own) before society deemed it necessary to have a bit of paper from university to say you could do something you had absolutely no experience in.

The kids growing up today seem to be doing so at an increasingly fast pace. Little bras and 'panties' for 4 year olds and bikinis for young girls! Shorty-short shorts, (you know the ones I mean) and skirts for girls and make up kits, shoes with heels and provocative tops. The boys are encouraged to play violent games, (yes, Cops and Robbers and Cowboys and Indians were violent, but there were wooden guns, not semi automatic plastic machine guns!), they are styled to dress like they woke up in what they are wearing and the hair! Don't even get me started on the I-haven't-brushed-my-hair-for-a-month look that takes about 45 mins to perfect!

The movies the kids are exposed to, even just the previews on the TV are enough to make them nag and beg until the parents are taking their 7 year old kids to see movies like SAW and the Date Movie, both highly inappropriate for anyone under the age of 16.

So, why I'm I on about this? Have you wondered why kids end up in care? Yes there are hundreds of different reasons, from kids having babies, to abuse, neglect, cyclical care where the parents were in care and now their children are in care and yet they have more kids.

What can we do? Pretty much nothing. We can't help the parent who is taking their young kids to see inappropriate movies, we can't even help that particular child. What we can do is look after our own kids. Help our friends and relatives who may be struggling with day to day family life. Have a sleepover roster with a couple of families so one couple gets a whole night to themselves once a month. Talk to eachother, talk to your kids about the ads they watch on the telly that are a bit much, (like the new Crunchy Nut Cornflakes ad! I love it, but it took a bit of explaining to the kids we had at the time that it was a joke).

If we talk to our kids the way we would like to be spoken too (still remembering that the parents have the final say), they will talk to their kids like that. They may even be able to make friends with some of the kids at school that are deemed strange or weird because they have learned tolerance and compassion from you.

I guess there is no particular point to this blog. I have just been thinking about what childhood means these days and how much harder it is to be one. You couldn't give me enough money to go back and do it all again in this day and age. I was lucky to have a happy childhood with no major traumas, a loving family and extended family and it really does hurt to see kids who don't have any of these things.

What is your favourite childhood memory?

des

Where does the money go?

2010-07-18T22:13:00.000+10:00

Someone sent me an email the other day asking a question I hadn't been asked before and honestly had never even considered!

The question?

"Where does the $25 for the Sponsor a Backpack go? Is it all for the backpack or is some for admin, wages or other expenses?"

Now, don't get me wrong, this is a great question and I'm glad it was asked!

The answer!
All the money from donations go into the backpacks and nappy bags. We purchase all the things we don't get donated and most of the time, I personally pay for any delivery fees and postage of the backpacks to centers and agencies. I pay for the advertising, (except once, but I had so much guilt about it I haven't done it again), phone calls, internet, laminated certificates, flyers, contact cards, stationary and all other admin costs including coffee, tea, chocolate and foot rubs for my partner Bruce, (because he's so wonderful, supportive and patient with me doing this project!)

As soon as our incorporated status is confirmed I'll be looking for a grant to apply for to cover admin costs so we can increase our profile not just on the net, but in the real world too!

I am thinking of adding a 'donate to admin' button on the site, LOL !!!!

So, believe me when I say, your money is going where it should. I absolutely LOVE to get donations through the mail and it's great when the courier turns up with boxes of donations for project! But the money is handy for when we need to top up on certain things like undies and nappies for example and sometimes it's just too expensive to post stuff!

I'd like to personally thank all the fans, followers and supporters for their trust in the project. This project really is a community in itself.

(and a side note - if anyone wants to put our banner on your page, or blog or include us in your newsletter, just email me at despinaparakas@yahoo.com.au!)

Less cranky blog

2010-07-11T20:45:00.002+10:00

Righto, I got another email from that other project mentioned in my previous blog. It said that they didn't mean to offend (I sent a reply email to say how disappointed I was at their reaction and hoped we could work together in the future etc), and it also said they'd assist if possible.

Glad they wrote back though.

In two minds about replying. Can I be bothered to form a relationship with a group that has such a strange attitude? or do I put it down to a bad day from the author of the email? Maybe they don't really reflect the views of the group?

Hmmm.... thoughts anyone?

What the?

2010-06-30T16:23:00.000+10:00

I had the YUKKIEST email today from someone who runs a similar project to ours. I won't mention who, but they basically provide kids in care and adults in crisis clothing packs, activity packs and toiletry packs. You'd think they'd be glad of some help right?

Wrong!!!!

The tone of the email was really abrupt and pretty rude I thought. Basically it said that they couldn't see the point of another group doing the same thing they are doing, I believe the exact words were, 'copy' what they are doing.

Pity I'd never even heard of their group before I started this project!

The email went on to say that their kits were copyrighted and I'm not allowed to copy them, (I'd like to see the paperwork on that), it said that they were 100% for the kids etc and the person running the project pays all the bills (as do I!) because nothing should be taken away from the kids. It also said becoming incorporated would be too expensive (it's $117). It also said that people have copied 'their' kits and haven't done it well and they have received backlash for it! But they didn't ask to see what we are doing, didn't look at our website, fanpage, blog or even call me.

The email also went on to say that they serviced the area in which I live twice a year anyway (so pretty much, why am I bothering...), which made me wonder why the agencies here are crying out for backpacks, shoes, hats, towels etc on a regular basis.

The most annoying thing about this email was that I wrote to them after a couple of kids I have in care turned up with the items provided by them. I wrote to thank and praise them and asked if there was some way we could support or help each other.

This particular group sent out 5500 packs during the year, which is brilliant. But they pack very differently to us. We pack everything needed into one pack, they pack a separate drawstring bag each for activities, toiletries and clothing. They mark their clothing as ages and we mark ours in sizes, and I only make that distinction because the clothes the 10 year old child came with were way too big as they were a size 8.

Do these people not understand that becoming incorporated allows access to funding opportunities like the Woolworths grants, Commonwealth bank grants as well as Govt and non govt grants, included funds specifically for admin purposes!

I am sitting here shaking my head in complete disbelief that this group had nothing positive at all to say about what we are doing, no words of encouragement, or maybe, "how about you guys do the far north of the state and we'll do central and the south east". That would have been a wonderful idea and would allow both groups to really focus on what we are doing.

I'm just really annoyed and shocked and I guess naive to think that everyone I contact would want to show support.

On a much more positive note - I just got an email from someone who saw our site and who would like to look into becoming a drop off point and possibly help more with packing the bags in Brisbane, (this 'other' group that sent the yukky email are based in the South East, but the general public haven't heard of them).

Copyrighted packs! bah!
'Copy' their service! bah!
It's like I'm taking their job, but we aren't getting paid!!!! I'm mystified. Even if they'd been polite with a 'thanks, but we are busy with our own stuff, best of luck', I could have lived with that. But....!

I just don't get why people wouldn't want to work together for the kids sake? What is with that!?

I'd love to know what you think about this. Feel free to leave a comment. Maybe I'm more shocked than I should be?

Storage area . . . Sorted!!! (well, nearly)

2010-06-19T17:13:00.000+10:00

With many, many thanks to the team at the Innisfail Overflow store and the big boss himself, 'David the Generous and Charitable', Backpacks 4 Aussie Kids now has a place to call home.

A few weeks ago myself, Tracy and Jaala spent the morning organising, tidying, sneezing, dusting and putting shelving together in the warehouse section of the Innisfail Overflow. It was a lot of work, especially considering my spatial awareness is a kin to that of a goldfish in a really big tank! 'Oh look, there's a nice treasure chest, I wonder..... Oh look! there's a nice treasure chest, I wonder...' so you get the picture.

Luckily for me Tracy is the Queen of organising, so after she explained at length how things should be set up and why, (pretty much did everything except draw me a picture in the dust on the yet to be cleaned shelving), we set to work.

Actually, once we got into it, the area took shape really quickly. Although, I did have to call Bruce in from work in his lunch break to help us put up the shelving. Some things are just too complicated for two blondes and a spatially challenged brunette!

(the afore mentioned blondes, the brunette is taking the picture!)

(this is me taking the pictures!)

Phil and Gilda of Liquid Tiles Cairns sourced and donated the fantastic shelving. I don't know what we'd do without their support. I can't believe how lucky we have been to have these wonderful people wanting to help our project!

Since these pix were taken, I have dropped more donations off and finally taken the last of the shelving in. I think we are going to need a small army of helper fairies to sort and organise all this before our next packing day! Never did I imagine how much support there would be for this project. I'm so humbled and honored that individuals and businesses are choosing to support something I'm so passionate about.

If you are a local in the Cairns, Tablelands or Innisfail area, don't forget you can drop items off at your Overflow store. There is a wheelie bin there with our logo on it. You can shop in store for things to donate or byo.

Family Capers Community Hero!

2010-06-10T09:27:00.000+10:00

The very first recipient of the Kids @ FC Community Hero!

Backpacks 4 Aussie Kids is the proud sponsor of the monthly hero award. Each of the three nominees for this month had inspiring stories of the selfless love that we so often see children give, without ever expecting anything back.

I was so amazed to read Lochie's story and so very impressed by his achievements in such a short time, (he is just 7 years old). The following extract is taken directly from the Family Capers website and was written by Lochie's loving mum.

----

Lochie - Nominated by his Mum, Louise

I would like to nominate my son Lochie Graham for the family hero award.

The list is endless when it comes to what my sons gives his family and the world around him. 200 words seems impossible to fit it in. But I will do my best.

Lochie was a hero when he was conceived. I had a neurological immune disease that was terminal prior to becoming pregnant, and this miracle pregnancy suppressed my immune system, hence stopping me from dying, giving me a little extra time. I thought I would get an extra 9 months because of him. Instead I was cured, he gave me my life back. So Lochie was a hero before he even took his first breath into this world.

Since Lochie was 2 he has shared his home, his toys, his room, his mother with over 60 foster children that we care for in our home.

The month he turned 4 he left behind the world he knew to travel overseas to do volunteer work with me for 3 months. Whilst there Lochie taught an adult how to swim and this adult who ran an orphanage, is opening a swimming pool for children in Africa, naming it the Lochie Graham Swim School.

2009 Lochie broke the record for his entire schools history on raising money for MS readathon.

In January this year Lochie was named the only Official Ambassador of Salem Australia, a charity dedicated to helping underprivileged children around the world and environmental projects. As part of his Ambassador work Lochie designed a Jerry School (inspired by his hero Jerry Lewis) in which Jerry Lewis is having dinner with him next month to discuss his ideas and drawings. Jerry School in Lochies words “is a free school for sad people to go to so that they can learn how to laugh again.”

He has a love affair with animals, he has rescued a kitten and a bunny in the last 2 years, becoming part of the family Maverick and Sam.

None of this is what makes him a hero to me. He is all that is good and pure in my world, and he always gives unconditionally, no matter how much I take. We have mother’s day, there’s father’s day, there’s many ‘days’, that honour us as adults. We don’t often get to honour our children with a ‘day’ where we remember how much they love, and how much they give. They are, after all, what makes us significant in the first place.
----

If you know of a child who you think is worthy of this monthly award, please nominate them at the FC website. Just to be nominated is a huge honour.

This month Lochie will receive a satchel, cooler bag, activity pack, books, a photo holder teddy and face washers from Backpacks 4 Aussie Kids.

Carer Allowance

2010-05-24T21:09:00.000+10:00

Just had a really interesting discussion on the Facebook FanPage. Here is the post that started it . . .

Backpacks 4 Aussie Kids How much do you think a foster carer receives each fortnight in allowance for the care of an average 4 year old?Remember, you have to - send the child to daycare if needed, feed them, buy them clothes, toys, drive them to drop off and pickup points for family contact, take them to activities that you would normally take... a 4 year old to, like dancing, soccer, kindygym, music, playdates etc.

My answer, as I understand it, was this:

Backpacks 4 Aussie Kids The payment is about $400 for a child birth to 5 years. Daycare where I live is about $60-$70 a day and if they are going to kindy it's about $800 a term. There is a one off start up allowance of about $80, but you only get that if the child is going to be with you for a certain amount of time. There is also a remote loading of about $40 a fortnight and here's the big one! an establishment payment, one off of about $400. To be entitled to that the child must be a primary placement, this means you are their primary carer, not respite, not on a month's order from the court or any other timeframe. But, carers have kids placed with them while a more suitable primary placement is being found and could have kids in their care for over 3 months!
So, basically, $400 a fortnight to cover all the costs that were mentioned earlier.

Here is a link to the Office of Child Safety QLD.

This next link tells you exactly what a foster or kinship carer can expect as an allowance per fortnight.

It was a really interesting conversation between quite a few fans and I think there is still a big difference in how each state assists their approved carers. I heard stories of people in Qld, (many, many years ago), getting their mortgages paid, extensions on their homes, cars bought for them and so on. I've been told this doesn't happen anymore but I'm not entirely sure this is a good thing, especially if kinship carers are willing to take on 3 or 4 cousins along with their own 3 kids!

But, I digress, the real point of the discussion was to bring to light the fact that carers put themselves in financial difficulty to keep placements going. Yes carers need to be financially stable, but when dealing with a government department payroll system . . . well, need I mention Qld Health as an example! Things aren't that bad, but there are times when carers need cash up front that they just don't have, or have to borrow from family and friends because the dept. is 'unable' to cover that cost.

I'll probably get into trouble for this post but I'm not saying anything carers don't say to eachother.

However, I want to make it clear - caring for kids in this way is an extremely rewarding and very challenging life choice. I know that people still do it with no govt. assistance for their relatives or grandkids. I'm not complaining, just letting people know, carers are very special people with hearts and homes as big as the sun! (For the most part anyway).

Feel free to leave a comment whether you agree or disagree, I'd like to know your thoughts.

des

Voucher offer for donations

2010-05-19T22:26:00.001+10:00

4 L'il Darlins is running this promo!

"Backpacks for Aussie kids needs donations for toiletry items for kids that go into emergency care. Sadly, there are many foster children that need help. Our family is making a donation, and I will give every person/family who donates
items to this cause, a $20 gift voucher to use at any time in our store. Please see the list below for items needed and details."

Chris, owner and creator 4 L'il Darlins

A very generous offer from a very generous woman. Chris has always given a helping hand to raise funds for B4AK. For Easter she raised $60 for the project by creating a very special Easter clip collection just for us.

Make sure you have plenty of time when you visit the website, there are just so many pretty things to look at. You'll be there for ages checking everything out! I've included some pictures from the site below.

Remember, Chris is offering a $20 gift voucher for people who donate. I hope people take up this very generous offer, everyone get something out of this, we get donations, Chris gets some excellent word of mouth feedback and you get $20 worth of accessories!

Packing Day March 21st 2010

2010-03-31T17:52:00.001+10:00

Well, I can hardly believe it!

We have completed our second packing day. In the weeks before the big day I spent hours stocktaking clothing and sorting sizes into sets ready to pack into the bags.

(Jaala and Des look at the stocktaked items! Crikey...)

Turns out I needed to do WAY more stocktaking than this!

When the girls turned up to pack we counted the number and type of nappies, bottles and dummies. Who knew that dummies come in different sizes? I surely didn't! I also found out that feeding bottles come in different 'flows' depending on the age of the baby. In case you didn't know - I don't have my own kids, (yet).

So, once all that was organised we started packing. Tracy's mum, Allison came along thank goodness and she made us cups of tea and coffee as well as sandwiches and sweets!

I felt we were much more organised this time, even though we did send Jaala in to the bargain stores to get extra dummies and bottles!

(torches and tissues)

The day was really busy and we only stopped for caramel tart with mini marshmallows on top and Dad's Greek Shortbread at the end of the day.

We managed to pack 117 bags that day.

(the dogs are 'on guard', Staffies!)

The next day I got a call for some specific sized bags for an agency. So I packed another 6.

62 bags went to Thuringowa near Townsville, and I've had calls from as far away as Ipswich, Bundaburg, Mornington Island as well as local agencies.

---------oo--------ooo-------oo-------ooo------oo------ooo------oo-------

So, are we making any sort of difference?

Here's something I heard today. An agency worker delivered a bag to a boy in his teens. The boy was excited to receive the brand new satchel school bag. It contained underwear, Lynx shower gel and deoderant, toothbrush/paste, a large blankie (with a US sports team on it), a torch, soap, shampoo and conditioner. Only one shirt was included because I didn't have any clothing for a kid his size.

According to the agency worker, he laid everything out on the bed on top of the blanket and organised his new things. These few items were his to control in a situation that was totally out of his control. He was very grateful and totally beaming that he had been given these things.

Is that a beautiful story or what?

Of course, none of this is possible without your help and the dedicated project team here in Innisfail.

ABC Radio Far North

2010-03-31T15:51:00.001+10:00

Download now or listen on posterous

backpacks.mp3 (1909 KB)

I was really excited to be interviewed by ABC Radio Far North a few weeks ago. I got a great response from the interview, lots of calls and kind words.

I'd love it if you had a listen. It goes for about 8 mins, and apparently I say 'um' more than once!

des

http://www.backpacks4aussiekids.org/
Filling backpacks and nappy bags with essential and personal items for children going into foster and kinship care.

Posted via email from backpacks4aussiekids's posterous

PakMag article for NQ Baby and Child Expo

2010-03-23T15:46:00.002+10:00

Pak Mag, once again, thank you for your support of our project. The article can be found on page 14.
The magazines editor Bree has been extremely helpful and we are so glad to have met her.

http://issuu.com/pakmagazine/docs/pakmag_-_march_2010

North Queensland Baby and Child Expo

2010-03-21T15:27:00.002+10:00

The Project has done it's very first Expo. The North Queensland Baby and Child Expo in Cairns.

I had emailed the organiser explaining that while we couldn't afford a booth, would I be able to put some posters up and hand out flyers to the stall holders. The lovely Jodie did more than that! She gave us a booth, organised a pull up canvas sign and artwork, advertising and and organised an article in Pak Mag and gave one free adult ticket to families that bought along a donation for the project.

It was such a wonderful opportunity to meet new people and get the message out to the general public about the project.

My car was absolutely chockers with donations on the way home from the two day expo! (Thank goodness packing day is soon!)

I was lucky enough to meet Terry Doyle who is a wonderful kids music entertainer, the President of the Babinda QCWA, Curtis Pitt (our local member), a channel 7 news crew and so many other wonderfully generous people.

From the Expo, I was asked to be interviewed on ABC radio Far North and from that interview I have had calls of support and pledges of donations.

All this because Jodie from 'themevents' gave us her time and provided us will space at the expo.

Backpacks 4 Aussie Kids

Untitled

Mrs. W - a personal account of a childhood in care

Calm Photographics

Jillybear... a young girl with a big heart!

Super EASY Brownies! Recipe by Richelle

Extract from our Facebook fan page

Extract from Facebook page Backpacks 4 Aussie KidsI get sooo pissed off when I hear about kids moving placements and turning up to their new family with hardly anything!!! Dear Carer, what were you spending the money on? Where are their clothes!!!???

What do you do when a child turns up at your place?

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I want to announce something very special that Overall Being is doing .....Head over too the website and see how YOU can help Backpacks 4 Aussie Kids raise funds to help children who go into Foster care and Kinship care.

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My answer, as I understand it, was this:

Here is a link to the Office of Child Safety QLD.

This next link tells you exactly what a foster or kinship carer can expect as an allowance per fortnight.

I'll probably get into trouble for this post but I'm not saying anything carers don't say to eachother.

Feel free to leave a comment whether you agree or disagree, I'd like to know your thoughts.

des

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Extract from Facebook page
Backpacks 4 Aussie Kids
I get sooo pissed off when I hear about kids moving placements and turning up to their new family with hardly anything!!! Dear Carer, what were you spending the money on? Where are their clothes!!!???